Good Luck Keeping Up, I Can't Even Do It...

KFGHDGP&(p8UFRE4WIOJRVNGU7&(uio

2012-02-15T15:28:00.000-08:00

YUP, that's about how I'm feeling right now! I won't go into details, because my life doesn't always need to be put on public display. But I'll just say...same 'ol crappy ola with my mutha.
But, my computer did some updatey thing and shut down and restarted. When it restarted, it was loading facebook and it happened to stop on someone's status update that I follow. Delayna was messing around and so I hit the little thing that stops her from moving the mouse.
Man, God knows what He's doing...ALL.THE.TIME!
Because I read this and it was exactly what I needed! I am worn out and exhausted and this really hit home!

"I pray in Jesus' name, may you fight the temptation to engage in relational battles that drain your strength, trying to prove your point or win your way or defend yourself. I pray you let your Lord be your defense. I pray you will never again get caught in the trap of blame of bitterness. May our God give you the wisdom to know what to fight for, for those your love, and how to fight in a way that brings blessings and breakthroughs to all of your relationships. In Jesus' Name, Amen" ~ Taken from Freedom for His Princess by Sheri Rose Shepherd

Perfect portion

2012-02-14T11:35:00.001-08:00

I bought these cute little plates at Target last week. They are not only the cutest little plates, but so perfectly portioned! This is Delayna's lunch for today (hence the Hello Kitty utensils). But while I was making it, I thought... "hey Melissa! (yes, I talk to myself) this would totally work for your lunches!"
So, I'm going to make me some lunches on these nifty little plates. Using the bigger spaces for the fruit & veggies. Ha, pretty clever I am every now and then :)

Day 5 of my 21 Day Daniel Fast

2012-01-05T22:11:00.001-08:00

I have been really wanting to blog about the Daniel Fast I started on the 1st of January. But 1-I've been too busy to be on the computer and 2 I haven't really known what to blog about.
Sure, I can blog my prayers, struggles, praise reports, but I guess I just haven't been able to pu my thoughts into words. I have a some things I wanted to put on today, just for rememberance.
Yesterday, I made the kids potatoes and ham per their request. I figured, since Jose was out of town (or so I thought) I would just make extra potatoes for myself and some soyrizzo on the side to go with it. I was kind of excited for the potatoes, something yummy, comforting and fried :) I didn't expect to have any issues...
Du Du Du Yup it was coming!
I warmed the kids up their ham and MAN, I wanted to devour it! Especially the fat! I had to move myself to the counter next to Oscar's bowl and dump the trimmimgs off into the bowl. I made it threw and my dinner was very scrumdiddleyumptious, but it wasn't easy.

Now today has been challenging today also. I was faced with a ghost from the past. Thank God for friendship, because without me being able to reach out to my friend (not someone who will tickle your ear, someone who will tell you like it is and put you in yuy place!)
She talked me down and gave me revelation. Thanks Jen!
I did okay with food. I ate really well all day. I made the kids spaghetti for dinner and Jose & I a yummy soup. I had Adi make most of the dinner. I went in the kitchen to check on her (I was getting ready for my PC TRNG) she had the pasta sitting in the pot of water. Um HELLO!?!?! She said she didn't know if it was done or not. So I automatically took the spaghetti fork and pulled 3 noodles from the pot and popped them in my mouth. After I chewed them, I realized what I did and yelled, "Oh my gosh, I just ate pasta!" Ha Ha!
But, it made me realize the nindless things we do, just out of habit or routine. I want to be more concious of things I do. It can't be a good thing to be living life so mindlessly. Which takes me to ny scripture I was reading tonight (because I skipped my morning read & had to play catch up. But, God knew what He was doing. I wouldn't have had this scripture hit me after the circumstances from the day)
So we are reading Proverbs for the mont of January, through my church & bible study. Today was obviously Proverbs 5. I almost highlighted the whole chapter it was that good.
Of course the program I use won't let me copy and add my notes, so I'll try later. But I wanted to just jour down a free things for the day :)

Kids say the darndest...Delayna

2012-01-02T13:49:00.001-08:00

We just picked up Adi's friend Cynthia and are all heading to the movies.
Cynthia complemented Delayna's shoes and said, "I like your shoes."
Delayna came back with, "I know, there pretty."
Oh my goodness, we laughed soooo hard! The innocent mind of the child.

Woah Buddy!

2011-11-18T18:10:00.000-08:00

Just found a pic of me at about 225lbs. I can't believe where I was and where I am today!

Here is a pic I just figured out how to merge from ^there^ to now...

Jesus Made...

2011-11-09T20:14:00.000-08:00

Delayna and I were driving to Wal-mart earlier after dropping the kids off at school and she tells me...
D- "Mama, guess what."
Me- "What?"
D- "Jesus made the twees."
Me-"Yes He did. Aren't they pretty?"
D-"MM HMM"

D-"Mama, guess what else."
Me- "What baby?"
D-"Jesus made the back yard."
Me-"He did. So you can play in it, huh?"
D-"Yup"

D-"Mama, guess what else Jesus made."
Me-"What baby?"
D-"The flowers."
Me-"He did, didn't he? And he made them beautiful!"
D-"MM HMM"

Me-"Delayna, guess what else Jesus made beautiful."
D-"What?"
Me-"YOU!"
D-"No He didn't. He made me pwetty."

Then we went through the whole family and close friends. I love this little girl!

That's yo seat

2011-11-06T13:57:00.001-08:00

Anthony was eating menudo and Delayna wanted some. So he got up to get her some. While he was up, she took his chair and placed it for her to sit on, then brought him the horse to sit on.
Too funny!

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30 Days Of Thankfulness, Day 2

2011-11-02T20:39:00.001-07:00

I'm thankful for my baby boy Anthony Herrera! He brings me MANY proud moments. He is loving, caring, sensitive (I know you don't believe that one), smart and amazingly athletic! He has been blessed with talent that could only be given by God.
Anthony, Mama loves you more than you'll ever comprehend! We've been through some stuff, but God ALWAYS see's us through! You've been made for greatness and God will bless you with only the best as long as you stay in Him.
I'm extremely proud of you and thank you for everything you bring into my life!

30 Days Of Thankfulness, Day 1

2011-11-02T20:38:00.000-07:00

Okay, so I started this on my facebook, but things get buried and I know here I can reference it all back. So I'm just going to cut & paste =)

Today I am thankful for my husband, Jose. He works extremely long hours, 6 days out of the week. Is the most amazing man I've ever known. He is the spiritual leader of this home that leads us daily. He lifts me up when I'm down, is there to be a friend whenever needed and is an awesome Papa to his 4 blessings.
~I ♥ You My Honey~

Halloween 2011

2011-11-01T19:22:00.001-07:00

After many different plan changes...my brother, sister in law, my nephews (Mark, Dakota & Devin) and niece by law, Jess all came over.
We went out here in our housing track. We had a blast!!!! Devin normally isn't into it, but he had a great time. Delayna loved every second of it and literally ran house to house. She was sooooooo cute!
Jose took the big wagon out to pull the kids when they got tired. But Ant & Jose ended up taking turns laying in it and chasing after kids scaring them. It was hillarious!
Heres some pics...

There's a snake in my boots!

2011-09-28T21:22:00.000-07:00

A couple of weeks ago I was rushing around trying to get ready for a party I had that night and I had to go and pick up Anthony from football practice.
When I went there to get him, he was no where to be seen, wouldn't answer his text or phone calls. I was pissed and freaking out. I called Jose for him to call Ant.
He finally got ahold of him and told him to get to me now.
When he got in the truck, he was giddy laughing about a snake that he caught and was chasing his friends with.
Delayna shouted out, "Bobo Anty, there's a snake in your boots?"
I started chuckling, even through my anger. So once she heard me laughing, she started feeding off of it.
She then said, "Bobo, there's a snake in your butt!"
After that, Ant and I just busted into laughing.
Through all the anger, frustration and the nerves geting to me, it's the little thing that made us bust a gut! And of course, leave it to Delayna and Anthony, my two little clowns to get me into a better mood.

Weight loss journey

2011-09-26T15:14:00.001-07:00

January 5, 2011 vs September 26, 2011
Save outfit, but different body

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My New Necklace

2011-09-16T23:06:00.001-07:00

So this isn't the best picture, but I didn't even think of taking a pic until now.
This is my new necklace, it may not be anything grand looking, but it's the story behind it.
I picked up Dominic from school today and as we got out of the truck and go into the house he told me, "Mama, I had such a good day today, I was able to pick a prize from the prize box."
I replied, "you did?"
He said, "yup"
Then he held out his hand and said, "this is what I picked, it's a present for you." He opened his little hand and inside was this green necklace.
After thanking him and smothering him in hugs and kisses, I decided I would revolve my whole outfit for my show tonight to match my new necklace.
So I wore my green bracelet & earrings and my green apron.
When I got home from my party, he was in bed, but came running out with Devin and the first thing he asked me was,
"Mama, how did everyone at your party like your necklace!?!"
Isn't he the sweetest!?! He is my precious little boy!

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Having fun with lunch

2011-09-06T07:11:00.001-07:00

I'm loving Pinterest.com lately! I saw something the other night where they made PB&J sushi rolls.
So Stinky is benefitting today.
They were super easy to make!
Just flatten your bread out with s rolling pin. Add your filling & roll!

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Scary thought

2011-08-17T22:42:00.001-07:00

So, I'm sitting here helping Ant do his homework and I happened to mention it on facebook (and maybe I complained that I'm exhausted). My Grandma Wallace commented about remembering her days doing the same thing (just an fyi, grandma had 7 kids). Then I replied, as long as I follow my grandparents examples, I will have successful kids.
Then I started thinking. Unfortunately, both of my parents have had quiet the share of struggles in their lives. And then the saying popped in my head, "you will always have one kid that isn't as good as the others."
It's hard for me to imagine one of my kids not succeeding. I have HUGE dreams for my babies. I've seen each one as particular things.
Ant is going to be my successful athlete. He wants to become a pro football player and I not only see him doing it, but he will succeed in it! Athletisism runs through his veins and he really is a natural!
Adriana will be my doctor. She plans on moving to the OC to study and then eventually move to Denver where she will practice in the OBGYN field.
Dominic is my brainiac & will do something in engenering, owning his own business, something like that.
Delayna is going to be my model/dancer, singer. She is ALL girl and loves music!
So to ever think of one of my precious babies not succeeding or not making it isn't even an option for me.
What are your thoughts?

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More on Loving the Unlovable

2011-07-17T22:18:00.000-07:00

Wow, has God been talking to me lately and then what's even crazier is that He talks to me and then on Sunday, Pastor Todd confirms what was said to me. It's just crazy! I'm really beside myself!
So, here's what I was spoken to this past week...

Day 7, Step 4 "The Top 10 Ways to Love the Unlovable"...
I highlighted the following excerpts from the page and then rolled off of those. So, I will bold & italicize the excerpts. Underline some things that jumped out at me...

So Evinda quotes the scripture, "You shall know the truth and the truth shall set you free". Another saying I've learned to live by is actually a name of a book written years ago by the wife of Raul Reece: "For things tto change, I must change."...As long as you do something with it, in other words, work on you, that unlovable/difficult person no longer holds the same power over you!

This step does require some honest reflecting into your own character because you must go back and look at the three adjectives you used to describe that unlovable person and asee if any of those adjectives actually equal a mirror held up reflecting you. Most of the time you WILL see yourself staring back at you through those descriptive adjectives....

If you still don't really see your own reflection after digging deeper, then you can move on. Don't get frustrated because after all, it never hurts to examine your attitudes and behaviors because the reward of understanding yourself better equates to less junk in your trunk.

First of the the verse Evinda quotes jumped out at me and I needed to dig deeper.

It is located in John 8:32, "Then you should know the truth and the truth shall set you free."

Are you asking God for his glasses to see others through? Do you want to see the truth about what junk you are carrying inside of yourself? The bible obviously says, "...The Truth Shall Set You Free." It's the truth about YOURSELF! Not the difficult person/people in your life.

Luke 10:26 in the Message Bible says,

He answered, "What's written in God's Law? How do you interpret it?"
He said, "That you love the Lord your God with all your passion and prayer and muscle and intelligence—and that you love your neighbor as well as you do yourself."

vs 27 states what? AND THAT YOU LOVE YOUR NEIGHBOR AS WELL AS YOU DO YOURSELF."

SAY WHAT!?!? Oh yes it does! And don't try to think for one minute, "well that's my neighbor, it's not the difficult person in my life. Their two different people. My neighbor is so sweet, caring and easy." --Oh whoops, did I just speak my thoughts out-loud?

These people are in your life for a reason. And it may just for us to dig into our own crap or junk and see that we've got some cobwebs to clean out. It may be to touch that person with the love they've never received before. It may be to show them the LOVE (agape) that only the Lord can give. Maybe it's for them to learn from you.

OH BUT WAIT! What read just one more verse further and what does it say?

vs.28~"Good answer!" said Jesus. "Do it and you will live." ~Message Translation

And he said unto him, Thou hast answered right: this do, and thou shalt live. ~King James

And He said to him, “You have answered correctly; DO THIS AND YOU WILL LIVE. ~New American Standard

“You have answered correctly,” Jesus replied. “Do this and you will live.” ~NIV

“Right!” Jesus told him. “Do this and you will live!” ~New Living Translations

Guess what, EVERY SINGLE TRANSLATION QUOTES THE SAME 5 WORDS THE SAME...
"DO THIS AND YOU WILL LIVE."
What does that mean exactly? I wanted to know, so I dug. The bible says in John 10:10 ~"The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full." NIV Some translations say "I have come so that you may have life and have it more ABUNDANTLY." So, what does Abundantly mean? According to Dictionary.com it states:
adjective

present in great quantity; more than adequate;oversufficient: an abundant supply of water.

well supplied; abounding: a river abundant in salmon.

richly supplied: an abundant land.

So in other words John 10:10 is telling me that He has come so that I can live my life in great quantity, adequacy, being well supplied.
Now let's put this all together shall we...
God wants us to not only see others through "His Glasses", but He wants us to see ourselves this "His Glasses". By doing this, we can love our "neighbor" or the difficult person in our life with the "abundant" love or supplies He has given us. When we love our difficult person, He is then able to give us our life even more "abundantly".
I pray this opens your heart to unspeakable joy knowing that through God, we can live an abundant life in and through Him!
Learning to love my unlovables...

Loving the Unlovable

2011-07-14T21:45:00.000-07:00

So, remember my last post on Bible Study, we were going to start the series, "Loving the Unlovable". I *thought* I was going to update you on this study and maybe even blog my thought's, journals. BUT, I honestly can't. As much as I'd like to, some stuff just doesn't need to be out in the bloggasphere (Melissa's made up word).
But, I did write something last week that I thought I'd share on here. I know I wrote it last week, but I just haven't taken the time to put it on here. I seriously need to be waking up at like 6 am to beat these kids to 'bug mode'. Once their awake, I feel like I'm at their becking call...UGH! I shouldn't be complaining, I'm SO BLESSED to be able to be at home with my babies, but sometimes!
Anyway, this isn't a rant post or a post about my kids. It's a post about something that God spoke to me.

So, day 4, Step 1 of "The Top 10 Ways to Love the Unlovable"...
I highlighted the following excerpts from the page and then rolled off of those. So, I will bold & italicize the excerpts. Underline some things that jumped out at me...

First step in recovery is the most important because the admission of their problem opens the door to their recovery, so does acknowledging the unlovable/difficult people in our life open the door to healing...
As a result of you changing, that person may or ma not move off the list you have, but...their unlovable, difficult attitude will no longer have the same power over you! CAN I GET AN AMEN!!!
With in all of this was the word LOVE that I highlighted & underlined.
Psalm 4:4 "Be angry and do not sin. Meditate within your heart on your bed and be still."
The word "meditate"-The act of thoughtful deliberation with the implication of speaking to one's self."
This is what the Holy Spirit took me to:
John 3:16, we all know the verse and can quote it, but I pulled some things out of it...
For God so LOVED the world.
LOVE~ Immeasurable LOVE, Agape (the highest and purest form of love, one that surpasses all other types of affection.) LOVE. We need to have that for each other. Doesn't mean we accept the wrong from others, it means we love despite. <-OUCH!
WORLD~The world (we the people existing) are full of unlovable characters/traits.
But despite our nstiness/ugliness, God gave his ONLY son to come and die for us.
God set the example of how we should love those, despite all.
So, what this all says to me is, despite every "ill" thing done, I am to love still. Doesn't mean I have to allow the "ill" in my life. Doesn't mean I have to live in misery or listen to the "ill". Doesn't mean I have to allow it to penetrate my soul.
It simply means, "Show God's unconditional love, despite it all."

So, in all of our ugliness, I pray that you can see past that unlovable/difficult person in your life. I like to say, get to know the story before you judge the cover. You never know what's behind all of that anger, hurt, illness coming from that person.
As you allow God to change your heart, I pray He gives you HIS Agape love that you can pour out to those difficult people in your life!

And my gum

2011-07-14T09:13:00.001-07:00

Last night I was putting the littles to bed. We were in Delayna's bedroom saying prayers. When I got done Delayna said to me, "Mama, a pwayers my gum!" So we closed our eyes & thanked Jesus for her gum we bought her earlier in the day. Then she said, "Mama, a pwayers sissy's gum." So of course we had to say prayers for sissy's gum too.
Sometimes, through all the exhaustion, these kids make me so full of joy!

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My Destination?

2011-06-30T23:13:00.000-07:00

So on the note of my weightloss & my Destination, I thought I'd update bible study stuff.
Jesus Girlz is wrapping up our first summer study, Balance of the Mind, Body & Spirit, tomorrow and will be starting our new study...
"Loving The Unlovable"...Can I be totally honest & transparent? Well, I'm going to! Everytime I think of doing this study I feel like Eeyore! I just kinda go...."UMPH!" And feel like moping. I KNOW God wants me to do this. He presented this to me about a year ago at MOTS. It hit me to the core! And that wasn't even doing the study, it was just Kim aka Evinda Lepins sharing her testimony and focusing on this study. God has been prepping me to do this study, and I truly believe he has the people in this group that need this. I'm believing for a breakthrough, not only in my life, but in others that I've been blessed to have their stories shared with me. So in preparing for this, I've kind of been praying. Yes, kind of. It hasn't been on the top of my priority list and I know it should have been! Simply because, I knew satan was going to attack. And guess what, he did!
Oh yeah, that sneaky little son of a %&#($)#)$*#(#*)#@)@_
And he took a stupid soccer game to do it with...REALLY!?!?! REALLY!
But, God has it all in His hands and I'm standing firm that He is going to do what He needs to do, no matter what the circumstance! I'm currently in a confused state and don't know what to do about somethings, but as I seek God's direction, I believe it will all be revealed.
So, on that...I've had 5 girls inform me that they aren't going to make it to the study tomorrow. I know things happen, but man, satan sure is on his P's & Q's and will use anything for people to not get to their Destination. I'm not worried though (I was at first!). God is orchestrating this all & guess what...If He's in it, His will, will be done!
For now, I'm going to leave you with the beginning of Loving the Unlovable (there goes Eeyore again). I will update you to what happens at the bible study.
Keep your focus, because we may not be what we should be, but we are on a journey! What's your Destination?

I beat my husband...

2011-06-30T22:57:00.000-07:00

OH YEAH! HA HA HA
Really, Mr. Herrera has ALWAY'S been Mr. Fit! He used to work out like a crazed lunatic back in the days, we would lift weights together, workout together, etc. He was ALWAYS more fit then me! I mean ALWAYS!!!
Well, just recently I started working out on the Gazelle that I was blessed with. And while doing the Gazelle, I started doing crunches, ball lift things and other ab exercises. Tonight I was doing them and Jose commented that he wants to start working out again. So I challenged him to get down on the floor and do what I was doing.
He did, but he was struggling! Is it bad that I find pleasure in my skinny, fit, construction husband not being able to keep up with the core exercises that I'm doing? I'd like to think it's not all that bad ;-)
So, after showing him up, my daughter thought she could show me up, but was proven WRONG! HA!
I've still got a LONG road ahead of me to get physically (spiritually & mentally) where I ~~want~~ NEED to be. But to see that I just outdid someone I'd NEVER thought I'd outdo, it gave me a push and made me feel good...OKAY, I'll admit it...IT MADE ME FEEL GREAT! HA!!!!
On that note, I was browsing around on Sparkpeople.com. I joined on there back in 2008 when I was working at the gym. I found my first weigh in stats. I am truly proud to say that from 2008, and after having a baby, I am down 23lbs! 2" off of my waist and thighs. Not where I want to be, again, but on the road to my 'Destination' (I've stolen that word from my new spiritual BFF, Evinda Lepins).
From here, I'm going to start a new blog post, just because that's what I need to do =)

Last Titans Soccer Tournament

2011-06-25T10:43:00.001-07:00

So, we are headed off to our last soccer Titans Team soccer tournament. I'm extremely emotional, thinking this is it for our team. I don't know where we'll go next, but we have LOTS to think about!
It's already been a crazy hectic day! It started yesterday when I attempted to get things done...But, I had some other things that I needed to tend to that were more important. Which I didn't get home from until 4pm. Once I got home I had to make dinner, feed everyone and get ready to head out to the Fusion bowling night (which I didn't get home from until after 12:30). Once I got home, I put Domi (who's getting sick) in bed & started getting everything I could done. I went to bed around 1am & laid there for who knows long. Set my alarm for 7:30. Woke up at 7:55 to a frozen phone, with no alarm working!
So I ran around like a crazed lunatic trying to get the house cleaned (because no one did it last night, while he was home alone, with no kids & nothing to do),.the remainder if the stuff packed, get beach stuff together (because someone decided at the last second that we'd go to the beach), shower Delayna & myself and get out.
Needless to say, we didn't get out of the house until 9:45 & we have to be in San Juan by 10:30.
Went & picked up Tyler & then someone decided we needed gas, because that too had to wait till morning, instead of before hand.
So we are driving as I start blogging & Dominic throws up....I'm really second guessing my day! Oh & now were stopping for Jose to pee.
Ugh & now Dominic is throwing up again!
Well, here's hoping to a better weekend :-/

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Mama, Moon Moon Moon!

2011-06-15T21:04:00.001-07:00

We have a beautiful full moon tonight. It's orange, bright & just humongous! I attached the pic, but it just doesn't do it justice.
So we went to John's Incredible Pizza tonight (that's a post for itself) and when we came out we all noticed the moon.
Delayna LOVES LOVES LOVES finding the moon whenever were out at night & tonight she's in moon heaven...LOL!
We have a DVD from The Laurie Berkner Band and at the end they sing a song called Moon, Moon, Moon. It's Delayna's favorite song. Anyways, just thought I'd share, too cute not to

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Pool Party @ Amber's House

2011-06-10T19:43:00.001-07:00

Just on a side note, it cracks me up when someone says "pool party at 'so & so's house' because Ants soccer friends allways say "pool party at Marcies house!". Well Marcies is the hang out spot because his mom likes to keep an eye on them, but Marcie doesn't have a pool! LOL!
So anyway, today was the first pool party I've ever been to. Amber had an end of school year party. It was so much fun to get away from my house & relax, well maybe not relax, but hang out at the pool with the kiddos. She bbq'd and had chips, dip & fruit. It was so much fun & nice!
Amber has been such a blessing in my life! We are kindred spirits & have so much in common.
Anywhoot, I'll leave ya with some fun pics from the day.

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Back to the inhaler we go

2011-06-07T22:17:00.000-07:00

My poor little girl has been coughing until she gags every night, during the night and in the morning. I noticed that she did it when running around with her brother or friends also. So, I took her into the Dr. today who said that it most likely is her allergies and asthma acting up =(
She put her on Zyrtec and both of her inhalers Qvar and Albuterol. My poor baby, I hate having her on these meds, it scares me! My 'step-dad' passed away from his asthma issues and it just is scary.
It was a crazy busy day, no particular reason, just was. Then I was planning on going to Yucaipa to drop off a bible study book and some PC orders, but laid down at 2pm and passed out until 3:58! GUESS I WAS TIRED!
Got up and made a very yummy dinner (maybe I'll blog it tomorrow). Adi had practice and I had to get to the store for some essentials, we had absolutely no fruit, except for 1 banana. Mama needs her fruits & veggies!!!
Went to Albertsons and got some great deals, spent under $50 for 4 pkgs of chicken, 4 boxes of cereal, 2 pineapples, 8 cucumbers, 2 bottles of coffee creamer, chips and some other things. Not Bad if I do say so myself =) Then to Walmart to get the other stuff.
Got home and realized I forgot Dee's medicine..DUH MELISSA! Guess I need more than just a 2 hour nap when I'm not getting enough sleep for my brain to function, egh?
We are down to 2 days left of the school year. I'm kind of excited, kind of sad. I LOVE LOVE LOVE having my babies home, the lazy days of summer and just enjoying each other. Most moms can't wait for their kids to go back to get out of their hair, but I really do love having them home with me. I don't like the not having a schedule and routine, but whatev.
Alrighty, so I'm outta here, I'm going to try to get some good sleep and maybe blog tomorrow when I have some brain power!
The Sleepy Mama

Bible Study #4...Coffee Hour With Chicklit Power by Evinda Lepins

2011-06-06T21:56:00.000-07:00

I had to come and share my most amazing encounter lately. I posted it on facebook and I'm just going to transfer everything here.

So, after much prayer and seeking the Lord in the direction that He wants me, I have finally recieved confirmation on the summer study.I have to give you the story behind it all, just so you can all see how good God is...You all knew I was praying regarding the bible study. I wanted to do something light, but deep, something that we wouldn't have as much work and time devoted to the study, but yet something that would keep us in the word on a daily basis. Keeping us connected to God and keeping our relationship built up. Some of you came to me with suggestions, but nothing was 'it'. Well, I had the opportunity to meet a woman name Kim. She came to my MOT's group last year and shared her testimony as well as some of her information & book. I was fortunate enough to have her at my table and I was able to spend some time with her and share my life testimony with her. We've kept contact and she recently visited MOT's again. She brought her products this time and I purchased her book. Now, unfortunately, I haven't had a chance to read any of her book, but I did glance at it. Something kept telling me that I should use this for the summer bible study. Now being that it's not in a bible study format, I kept pushing the 'idea' out of my head. WELLLLLL, last Friday, I jumped onto Facebook while I was outside looking for something for dinner. I noticed that Kim invited me into her group. So, I accepted the invite, but didn't have a chance to really look at it. Later that afternoon Jose and I were in the garage and I went to her page on my phone. The first thing I saw was the following..."Okay, so I'm really giving some serious thought to something because I keep getting this question from complete strangers: "Does CPM have a women's Bible Study?" So, let's put it out there. Would anyone be interested in a once-a-month Bible Study using our "Coffee Hour with Chicklit Power, A Cup of Encouragement for the Day" book? There's some great series in there. Let us know:)"OMG...ARE YOU KIDDING ME!?!?!?! So I replied the following:"Hey Evinda Lepins, this is awesome!!! I will be wrapping up my M2C bible study next week and I have been praying about doing a summer bible study. I have had your book next to my bed and it's been taunting me to use it for the summer bible study (HONESTLY!!!). But I didn't know, because it's not in a format that I could figure out. So, I brought the subject to the table at my bible study today. We will be meeting every other week. I want something light & not too deep. And a book that we can get our hands on now. Then I saw your post on this. I would LOVE to be your "guinea pig" and use your book as our bible study!!! Let's talk about it. I would like to start June 10th. You can either message me here or contact me on my cell phone. I will be in San Diego for soccer tournaments this weekend, but I will get with you!!! LET'S DO IT!"
Personally, I don't believe in coinsidence...As Kim aka Evinda told me, "absolute GOD things". So, not only do we have a bible study and one that we can get our hands on right away, BUT...ARE YOU READY FOR THE KICKER!?!?!?!Kim aka Evinda (btw, that's her author name) is going to be joininig us on Friday for our Luau and will be selling the books, signing our books and explaining the bible study to us!!!How freaking cool is it that God confirmed this the way that he can only do and we not only have an amazing bible study set up for the summer, BUT...WE GET TO MEET THE AUTHOR IN PERSON!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!ACK! HOW COOL IS THAT!?!?! Come on, how often have you met an author of a published book?Okay, I'll settle down now. I just can't tell you how amazing God is and how hard it's been to keep this cat in the bag. It's been clawing at me all week! And, being with Amber all weekend, had the book on me and I couldn't share with her! It killed!!!So, I hope you all are as excited as I am!

Follow up to that...We met this past Friday and I can't tell you the excitement my girls had! I actually have one girl that declined the summer bible study, but after hearing Evinda's story and what we believe God is going to do, she decided to join!

God is good & is giving us favor. On July 22nd we will be wrapping up the next bible study called, Loving the Unlovable. The next day, Evinda will be having her CPM's One Year Anniversary Party...guess who will be there with a testimony of her book becoming a bible study!?!?! YEAH, The Jesus Girlz...HA HA HA HA!!! AMAZING, SIMPLY AMAZING! I can't wait to see what God is going to do, the break throughs that I am praying to happen, the walls to be taken apart one brick at a time.

I will keep ya'll updated!

Bible Study Follow Up

2011-06-06T21:43:00.000-07:00

Back in September I wrote I'm Birthing and shared what God told me to do and move forward in His will for my life. Well, here I am, 8 months, 4 bible studies and 12 precious souls later.
That's right, I've completed 3 bible studies (Frazzled Female, Victoriously Frazzled & Made To Crave). I'm currently starting a new study out of the book, Coffee Hour With Chicklit Power by the name of 'Balance of the Mind, Body & Soul'.
I honestly didn't think that I would have gotten this far in this ministry, but man, when you step out and allow God to step in, you NEVER know what is going to happen!!!
The only regret that I have is that I didn't blog more frequently about the things that I was going through as long as what the study was doing for me. Especially this last one, Made To Crave. Oh man has it jacked me up in a good way! I am on a journey of learning to love myself, accept myself, take time for myself and learn that I AM MADE FOR MORE!
I'm currently focusing on my health, eating, physical activity (yes, exercising will be a part of it, as soon as my body is aligned with God's healing power! I'm crippled with a horrible sciatica nerve that just recently got messed up again down at the San Diego tournament. It hurts in places I didn't think your back would effect. But anywho). I have a few people in my life, including my 73 year old Gramma that has successfully lost significant amounts of weight by using the BodyBugg. After doing who knows how many different diets, "life changes", trying this & that, I decided that I would do something that has shown effectiveness in the lives of real people around me (including my Gramma). So, Melissa bought herself a Mother's Day present. Oh yes, I went and bought myself a BodyBugg. I have been on the 'program' for 3 weeks now, and even though I haven't lost a significant amount of weight (due to this bodybugg, I've learned that I am physically active without working out. I can easily burn over 2,500 calories a day just by being me and doing my daily chores/running around/taking care of kids & house. My biggest problem when I'm focused on my eating is that I don't eat enough. I'm lucky if I get in 1,400 calories a day sometimes. Therefor my metabolism shuts down and thus the reasoning for not losing.). But it's not the numbers on the scale for me anymore, it's feeling content in who I am, knowing that I made better choices that day for myself and no one else. That if I did have a slip up, there is always tomorrow to make it right. And that putting God first in all I do means more than devouring those Oreo's with a big 'ol glass of ice cold milk!
Yeah, I've come a ways from where I was regarding my weight, but even further in where I am in my walk with the Lord.
I'm really going to try hard to blog daily. The new bible study that we are starting requires us to journal. And my way of journaling is on my blog. I do have many journals that I've kept notes in for my bible studies, but they get tossed to the side. Here allows me to look up by subject, dates, etc to see where I was, what I was going through, etc.
I pray that whomever reads this is blessed & can see God's hand at work. It is all Him & I am utterly overwhelmed and humbled that He would use a broken little girl to reach the lives of those that I'm reaching. I don't know where this journey is going to take me, but I do know that as long as I seek Him first, it will be successful...

Frustration

2011-06-04T12:59:00.001-07:00

So I'm sitting in Gus' with my family. Jose ordered the burger & fry family pack and a chicken salad for me. They brought the burgers & fries out and I am sitting here having the hardest time not grabbing a few fries & dredging them in ranch. Ugh this sucks!!!!
My salad is here and it's fried chicken tenders on top with bacon. I want to devour it! And dredge it in ranch.
I didn't though. I served myself a fourth of the salad & threw a few forks of ranch on.
Jose asked me what was wrong, he could see the frustration on my face. This is so not easy, but it will be worth it.
I want to cry I'm so irritated :(

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Just a little news article

2011-06-02T15:07:00.000-07:00

Well, I felt as though our Titan Boys deserved some recognition for their accomplishments this past tournament season. So, I submitted an email to the Banning-Beaumont Patch, it's just a little local web-paper I guess you would call it that is like a news paper, but is on the web.
We shall see what happens. But I wanted to put it out on here, just because I think these boys deserve some recognition and I don't ever want to forget what these kids have accomplished!

Hi Guy, I'm a mom to a local teen that is part of the local AYSO Tournament Team called Titans. I would love for our boys to be recognized on your website to bring some light to this team. They are a group of 14-16 year old boys that attend Beaumont High School and play Fall Season Soccer for our local AYSO, Region 641. After the fall season the boys come together and play on the tournament team and travel across Southern California.
This past weekend we traveled down to San Diego and played in the Top Gun Tournament. This tournament is known as "the best of the best" when it comes to tournament teams. We've attempted to play in this tournament in the past, but never qualified. This year our stats allowed us to qualify for this tournament.
We were down a strong player and it was obvious in our first game, as we lost 1-0. The boys came together and realized that they can do this. The second game played on Saturday they won 2-1 (and one of our boys accidentally made the goal for the other team). Sunday the boys went out early, playing their first game and tied 2-2. Now we weren't looking like we were going to keep going on and even one of the families planned to head home after our second game of the day. Second game on Sunday, we needed to win 3-0 to guarantee us a spot in the Semi-Final's game. The boys were ready to put up a fight and fought they did!!! The Titans team walked away winning that game 2-0. Now being that we didn't make 3-0 we didn't get the guarantee for the Semi-Final game. We had to wait to see who won the other games later on in the day to determine if we moved on or not.
Later that afternoon we got word that the team that needed to loose for us to go into Semi-Finals lost and WE MADE IT!!!
Monday, we knew we were up for 2 games. The first game determined if we go on to play for 1st & 2nd if we won or 3rd & 4th if we lost.
Well, our boys went out and played the game of their life! As a soccer mom, I have to say that this was THE MOST AMAZING GAME I've ever watched! Our boys walked away winning with a score of 3-1. This guaranteed us moving on to play for 1st/2nd place.
After a LONG, HOT, HARD game our boys lost, but still WON! As the man handing us the medals stated, "This is the toughest tournament in So. Cal., for Beaumont to come out and play against the best of the best and walk away with 2nd place, you are winners!"
Titan's boys have played 6 tournaments (14 games) in the last 21 days. They have medaled in every single one. 1-1st place, 2-2nd places, 1-3rd place & 2-4th places.
I think this little team that doesn't get much recognition from our home town needs to know about these kids. They are on fire and will be a successful group we will be reading about in a few years down the road!
Here is a link to the Standings for the Top Gun Tournament: http://ayso285.clubspaces.com/standings_css.aspx?programid=120794&divisionid=289254022
Thank you for the time you've taken to read this & I appreciate your work in this community!

Well, while I was posting this, I recieved an email. Looks as though my story on the boys is going to be published! I'm so excited for them!!! It is well deserved!

Relay For Life 2011

2011-05-20T17:25:00.000-07:00

In all honesty, I didn't know if I'd ever do RFL again due to the lack of response in the past 2 years and how little participation I had in my first 3 years of doing it. But, God ALWAYS has His perfect timing! I have also learned that when we take ME out of the equation, HE can work to His full potential!

So this year Pastor Todd approached me about doing relay and of course I jumped on the opportunity. I have a passion for this, don't know why, but I do. I didn't know how well it would turn out, especially since every week that he was ask who was willing to join the team and support us, everyone clapped and agreed. But then to actually step forward, I didn't have many people sign up.

At first I was looking at circumstances and everything that *I* was going to have to do alone. But then as I turned to God for direction, guidance and ultimately strength, He told me, "This isn't about you Melissa. Do it unto me and in support of everyone that has come to you with testimonies of what cancer has tried to do." And as I reflected on that and opened my eyes to what I can be doing in support of my wonderful friends and my precious friend Janell's mom Debbie, I walked forward in faith.

The week of relay, I went to the meeting Wednesday evening. I had 20+ people signed up to walk and $365 raised for our team. My goal to reach by the end of the weekend was to raise $500 and have at least 24 people on my team to cover all 24 hours of the relay.

I am blessed and honored to say that I had 42 people join my team and OVER $1,000 RAISED!!!!!

I can't even tell you how humbled and brought to my knees I was!

I woke up Saturday morning and looked online to see we were up to $920. I laid in my bed just feeling overwhelmed with emotion and crying. I was literally brought to my knees and was praising God for what He did for this team and in support of so many people that have been effected by this horrible monster. I finally got up, got ready and went on with my day.

As the morning rolled in and my team showed up, it was amazing! To see so many people come out and support this cause. Then my Survivors. I was left speechless! Bob, Arlene, Breanna & Julie all represented a different aspect of what Cancer TRIED to do & failed. Because, I serve a good God. A God of healing, grace & mercy.

This was truly an amazing day to remember. Here are some random pics I snapped...

This is the opening ceremony with the representatives playing Taps

The Legacy Crew in our Legacy shirts and our purple survivors

Julie, always gracefully late. So I made her change right then and there =)

Mrs. Kinney, Principle of Sundance Elementry, but a HUGE roll model in my life. She was one of the first people to encourage me into my career. I do believe she is a 4 time cancer survivor! WOW!!!

Here come our survivors! Bob, Breanna & Arlene

Arlene being greeted by her #1 supporter and the man that has stood by her side, Ernie.

Hey, it's Bob!

Michele, Breanna & Rocky. Cancer tried to take Breanna as a baby, but God has other ideas for her life!

Yvonne, my spirit girl! She did our Purple Lap this time around...isn't she AWESOME!

Our team was given the left overs from the luncheon, so we were grubbing!!!

Lovin Jule and her mama in their supportive wear

Then on our Team Spirit Lap, I had a crazy idea to have all of the men that were there representing Team Legacy to wear something to 'support' the cause. All I have to say is...I have some amazingly supportive men in my life!!!

One of our many Luminarias that were out on the track.

Then the darkness fell. You'd think everyone would pack up and go...BUT NOT IN MY TEAM! Here's some chicas chit chatting it up.

Pastor Mick came out to support us and even brought the word with him. That man, he NEVER leaves home without his bible. He is amazing!!!

That would be my niecey-poo under there. She sure does love her Tia, always here to support me!

Remember my Purple Glam girl!?! Well here she is, my Glowing Lady and her friend to come light up the dark night =)

I must give props to some people I didn't get to get pics of...Nina Bisel, Maria & DJ did about 3 hours of walking and got us TONS of spirit points. Their enthusiasm is contagious and you couldn't help but cheer them on as they went by.

My sweet friend Jodi Lugo, who has been on my team every year since starting this, with out fail. And she always takes those hard midnight hours.

My Sissy by law, she stepped up to watch my two littles so that I could burn the midnight oil and then get to church in the morning, soccer for my boy after that and then attempt a small cat nap.

My mom & husband who prayed for me and lifted me up when I felt like this was all going to crumble and fail.

If I missed someone, please forgive me. I had SO many people out supporting this team and even behind the scene stuff.

OH, Nick and Denise who came out Friday to help me set up, decorate, run around for me...YOU TWO ARE AWESOME!!!

Bob for taking all of my frantic calls and running for me also.

And sweet Denise Johnson. He said he was there just for Bob, but I know somewhere in his heart he was there to suppport me too =) Love you Denise!

Relay For Life 2012...TEAM LEGACY IS READY FOR YOU!!! We are going to BRING IT!

Follow up to my 35 before 35

2011-05-03T13:40:00.000-07:00

I was just reading through my posts looking for the one that I did about Glen Ivy. Well, I found it and HAD to do a follow up!
So here is my list, and after the list in bold I'm going to list my follow up, if any =)

1) Go to Guatemala to meet/see my husband's family
2) Become a Director for Pampered Chef
3) Re-do my floors in my house, tile, wood floors and concrete~We actually lost our house to a foreclosure and God has moved us twice. My new home now has WOOD FLOORS & TILE! HAAA
4) Be a Football Mom~Well my oldest son, Anthony, started playing football last year. He was on Freshman Football for the Beaumont Cougars. Towards the end of the season, the coaches were so impressed with him that he was moved up to JV. He is training now for this next season's season and will be playing for JV with a starting position and the coaches are talking about moving him up to Varsity.
5) Take a cruise with my Honey, ALONE!
6) Take a Disney Cruise with the family
7) Get out of debt, except for my house~still working on that =(
8) Get to a healthy weight and be more focused on me as a person & not a wife & mother~Well, I must say, I did start WW and lost 30lbs. Yay, I know, but I'm not very Yay right now. I've gained some weight, lost sight, got off track and gained. But I'm back on track and doing it right this time. Looking to God for my strength and a group of amazing Jesus Girlz. With that, I know things will be different!
9) Revamp my wardrobe
10) Get a built in pool
11) Get my mom into her own place
12) Obtain Good health insurance
13) See a different president in office
14) Run a 5k~Retraining for that now. I was up to a complete 5k before I stopped working out and now I have to start all over again :-/
15) See my marriage grow~All I can say is, I love my husband more today than ever! He is my rock and I don't know what I would do without him. I think my own insecurities have gotten in the way of alot of things. But as I learn who I am in the Lord, things change.
16) See my ministry that the Lord has for me flourish~I wish I would have noted where my ministry was at this point of time. I've headed up nursery, walked along side the prayer chain leader, supported the youth ministry & couples ministry. But God has taken me on a journey to lead women's bible study. I'm now on my 3rd bible study and my group has grown from 6 people to 16! I'm overwhelmed with humbleness that God would use this broken vessel to touch the lives of some amazing women. Even some that I've looked up to. This journey He has me on is amazing!
17) Become better at taking time with God, daily~Let's just say, this is a never ending battle, just like my weight! It takes a daily conscious decision to make that time. I'm not perfect, but I am getting better.
18) Stand with my friend, Jessica, at her wedding
19) Plan Jessica's wedding =) ~I would love to report that I've done the last two, but not yet. God's still preparing her husband & her
20) Spend more time with my extended family
21) Have another family reunion
22) Plan a family reunion for my other family
23) Learn to sew
24) Get a tattoo on my wrist~I did to that! I got a cross with angel wings around it. It's very special to me. I got it done just before my cousin Robin passed away. The wings were supposed to be butterfly wings to signify the change in my life, but my nephew did angel wings. I look at it as my Angel (Robin) always with me.
25) Get a tattoo on my back
26) Go to Glen Ivy & get the FULL treatment~this is what started this whole follow up post. I found them on facebook today and they are giving away a trip for Mother's Day. I wanted to show them that I really do want to visit them. To this day I haven't had the advantage of going. Makes me sad, but one day I WILL cross this off my list!
27) Just go to Glen Ivy
28) Watch Anthony walk across the stage at graduation with MANY awards & honors~man, now that he's in HS, this one makes me so sad! I'm so proud of my babies, but it makes me so sad to see them grow up so quickly. Especially my baby boy! He brings me so much pride & joy.
29) Get a weekly scheduled pedicure~YEAH RIGHT! Who's got money for that anymore
30) Manicure weekly wouldn't be bad either
31) Go to the Grand Canyon again with the kids
32) Watch my church grow & expand~Let's just say God is bringing in some awesome people! His works are filtering down and there are some great things happening!
33) Be a part of my church expanding & helping women obtain jobs
34) Watch a Broncos Game LIVE
35) Throw a Super Bowl Party~We will be planning it this year, hopefully our Broncos will be a participant. We tried last year, but everyone fizzled out.

So, that's my update. Weird how some things have happened! But blessed by it all!

Sweetest Blessings

2011-03-11T17:33:00.000-08:00

My babies are just being so sweet to each other, I just love it!

Anthony tripped outside and busted his arm all up, and Mama had to play Mama (I don't get many opportunities now that he's 15 & "too old"). Delayna saw that 'bobo' hurt his arm and she was all attentive to him. Then Anthony went and sat down in the living room and she up to me and asked me if Ant could go outside with her. I told her, go ask him to play outside. So she went to Anty and said, "Bobo, a play side Me 'a You". Awe, she's so cute. He asked her, "you want me to go play outside with you?" Of course she was telling him yes & he never did, but they were just too cute together. She is her big bobo's baby sister for sure!

Then Ant was watching Domi play TS3 on the X-Box and he wanted to play with him. He went to get the remote to 'help' him, but Dom my attitude child got all mad and was fighting with him. But eventually, they were playing together.

Now Ant just came to me with Dee's head band and flower over his head and she's crying over it. He tells me, "Mama, tell her I look so pretty."

My Sweet Blessings. There isn't a day that goes by that I am flabbergasted that God gave me such awesome babies!

Golden Way

2011-03-08T10:58:00.000-08:00

When I think of that, I think of the Golden Streets I will be walking on when I pass the gates of heaven...don't you?
Well, for now, it's going to be the street I'm walking and driving on in less than a month...WE GOT THE HOUSE!!!
I'm so stinken excited, I can't even tell you! Julie had sent me links to some houses that were the same model/floor plan of this house. I have to admit, I wasn't too thrilled. Jose and I also looked at a house that was condemned down the street and I was really put back on this house. So I started putting in my list of 'wants' to God. That sounds crazy, but the bible tells us in Hebrews 4:16 "So let us come boldly to the throne of our gracious God. There we will receive his mercy, and we will find grace to help us when we need it most."
And in Psalms 34:4 the bible tells us; "Delight yourself in the LORD and he will give you the desires of your heart."
REALLY?!?! So, after looking at the houses, I started telling God..."I would really like all tile or hardwood floors, Lord. They are so much easier to take care of! And shutters, they are easy to maintain, the will help with our energy costs, which you know needs to be cut down, especially with what we are putting out now. And an office/kid's play place. It would be awesome to have a place that I can work in as well as a place that the kids' toys can go in. I mean, I guess I could put them in their rooms or the living room, but it's been so nice to have the loft where they can play. Lord, ultimately, I want your will to be done. But, I'm approaching you boldly and giving you the desires of my heart."
Through the day I was just talking with Him, chit chatting, just whatever. And as I got ready to go meet with Chuck and Teresa, I asked God. "God, can you just give me a sign when I enter the house. Let it have tile or hardwood floors so that I can know this is from you. I don't want to get my heart set on something that isn't your will. I don't want to get excited out of turn. I want to know that you are taking care of this, even though I know you are, but would be nice if I can let go of the anxiety of the unknown."
So, we got ready and headed over. While driving we were discussing placement of Jose's tools, mixer, truck, etc.
We got to the house and waited for them to answer....
A younger boy answered and I asked for Chuck, he informed me it was his father and he was coming. Chuck approached the door and welcomed us into the home....
The house has TILE FLOORS! Then as you walk a little bit further in, I see the formal living/dining area has CHERRY HARD WOOD FLOORS! WHAT?!?!?!
We went through the house and the house is amazingly gorgeous! A room with bath for my mom, another that can be an office/toy room. Down the hall it has another full bathroom, two bedrooms for the kids and the master that is beautiful! A laundry room just off of the bedrooms attached to a 3 car garage, with remote control (have I ever mentioned that in all my houses, I've never parked in my garage because they were too small & didn't have garage door openers?!?) Then back down the hall you go into an open kitchen with granite counter tops (have I ever mentioned how much I love my granite?) a center island with the sink and a bar attached. Ummmm, it has a DOUBLE OVEN, WTH!?!?! Watch out holidays, I am going to have a double oven, we're all in trouble! A cook top with storage right under it for the pots & pans, a breakfast nook, beautiful open living room with a fireplace. Um and I have a closet for a pantry, WAY COOL! There is a little door that you go into the back yard. No slider, but the windows in the living room and kitchen make up for the slider, BIG TIME! Out back there is a covered patio, ya'll know how we love to BBQ! Rose bushes, rock lined flower beds, a nice sized patio that goes into a concrete lined gorgeous grass area. Not too big, not too small. We asked about the playground being placed back there and they are okay with it. Then Chuck tells Jose, "come on, let's go around the side, I have a storage shed you could get use out of." HA!
It is more than I imagined!!!
We sat down and talked with Chuck and Teresa and I can't believe how awesome they are. They are willing to work with us with a move in date, Teresa told me she wants me to make this my home. They are looking forward to us taking this house and loving it as much as they did.
Chuck told us they would be having his brother, who happens to be in real estate and the business of flipping houses, contact us to go over other details. We went home with such a peace!
This morning, when I started this blog, Gary, Chuck's brother, called me up and was talking to me. He asked me about our situation and I gladly gave him the 411 of not just this house, but our last also. He couldn't believe that we've had to go through this twice in a year. He felt so bad for us. He also informed me that the bank in deed will most likely be coming to us for a 'cash for keys' type of thing. He stated that when we get the letter, we are to contact him. He is willing to negotiate our time we have and money we should be receiving to make it to where we won't have to pay out of our pockets for the move-in costs...
WHAT?!?!?!?!?! Your kidding me, RIGHT! OH NO, God is just that good!
I am flabbergasted and beside myself. Someone commented to me when all this was happening, "Beggars can't be choosers." Um, I'm not a beggar, I'm a child of the MOST HIGH GOD. He is my Abba Father, my one and only Daddy. I can go to Him, BOLDLY. With the desires of my heart and I know that if it will be used according to His will, ALL my needs WILL be supplied!
I am praising my Daddy. He is spoiling me with the desires of my heart and as long as I am a child after His heart, His will and His ways...He will supply all my needs.
So my dear reader, know, that God is a great God and He cares deeply about your future. I'm excited to see where God is leading me and my family. I don't know what lies around the corner, but I do know, that as long as I trust in Him...That's all I need!

****AFTER THOUGHT...In my previous post, I had mentioned that I already drove through this neighborhood last week looking for houses, but I let Jose drive through anyway...Chuck informed me last night that he put the sign up Sunday morning, just before I had called him. CRAZY! Then he said that we were the first ones to call and he thought I sounded good so they have been taking calls, but discussed giving us the first shot. Before we left, he commented, "Well, I can go take the sign down now. I'm tired of my phone ringing off the hook. HA, GOD AGAIN!****

Hello loves

2011-03-07T13:40:00.000-08:00

Well, I posted Sunday about 'Icing on the cake'. Well, I am here today to update ya'll, or just myself, because only God knows who all reads this crazy blog.
Anywhoot, God has been giving me a peace and joy these past two days. I woke up Saturday with an excitement, not because we went to LA, just an inside joy. Sunday I woke up feeling the same way. Just a joy, peace, excitement. Crazy, with all the stuff going on, that I would have a joy, excitement, peace. But that's what happens when God is in your life.
We got up and went to church on Sunday, and man was it GOOD! Pastor talked on "The other side". Basically, the other side of where we are going, where God is taking us, our journey we are on. I've been going through some stuff lately and I have seen personally what 'the other side' looks like. I can look back and see what my journey process was and that the process was worth the outcome.
So here I am, in another journey, with my house. I just got done reading my post from a year ago, 'Will you ride your charriot?' and reflecting on what God did for us, when we thought we were in the worse situation of our lives. God is good and will get us through, even though the tunnel looks dark and long. *It's funny that the same situation is arising in my life a year apart. And the Lord is bringing similar sermons to my spirit.*
So, back to the house situation. Last week when I found out about our house being in the trustee sale, I of course freaked out and started looking for houses all over. God kept telling me to stop, and that He will bring a house to us. Basically, trust Him and slow down.
So, daily, I would be thinking and just talking to God about the house. There were a few things that I felt He was showing me about the house we are going to get. Maybe so that when it was presented to us, we would know. Maybe it was just my wants and He is going to give me the desires of my heart, I don't know. But here is the list of things, I felt God was telling me would be in our next home:
1. Single story home, possible ranch style
2. It would be rented from an older couple, looking for long term renters to take care of their home.
3. I wanted Oak Valley area, due to school locations etc. *BUT, I was looking ALL over Beaumont.*
4. The number $1,800 kept popping in my mind.

So last night, Jose and I had to take Ant to quince practice and we decided to drive around Cherry Valley. We drove ALL of CV and found nothing, but a teeny tiny house for rent...NOT GONNA HAPPEN!
Then he drove down and into some parts of upper Beaumont and then we went into Oak Valley. I showed him the house Darci is looking to buy and just drove around. I had already been in here, so I knew there wasn't anything in there. As we were driving, our lovely landlord called. Jose was on the phone with him while driving around. We were going through the last part of OV when I saw a little sign that said, "For Rent". So I smacked him and told him to pull over. He did and I got the number. We left and went to the sports park to go watch the adult league play soccer.
While Jose was out on the field, I decided to call the number to the house. Talking to 'Chuck', he informed me that the house is a 5 bedroom, 3 bath, 2,300 something sq ft home. He is wanting to rent it for $1,800. It is a single story that him and his wife live in now and they are retiring to the desert in April. He's wanting a renter to occupy the home in April.
HA HA!!!!! Now if this doesn't line up with what God was telling me, then I'm carazy!
So we go meet with him tonight. I'm so nervous, but excited. Such a weird feeling, just not knowing. I'm praying this is the house for us. Just to have something I know I can work towards helps so much. The 'not knowing' is what drives me crazy!
So, I guess I'll update you later...
Melissa =)

Icing on the cake...

2011-03-05T11:47:00.001-08:00

So, my family and I have beem through some major stuff these past few month, to say the least! Illness went rampid through my home, kids with no insurance that sprained ankles, dealt with pneumonia, bronchitis, stomach flu, and who knows what else. Lost a friendship, money difficulties, a birthday we didn't get to celbrate due to money, and the list goes on a few miles long!
But through it all, God has been here walking alongside us and getting us through. The friends that have come alongside us are amazing, the resources that have been placed in front of us, learning to humble myself and let go of the need to CONTROL!
Well, like I said, the icing has been put on the cake. Monday morning, I walked out to put my old flowers in the trash and find a "Trustee Notice Of Sale" on my front door. Being that we were here a year ago with our home, I knew what that was and what it meant. I just went ballistic! Called up Jose and unfortunatelyhe was pouring concrete and couldn't talk. I was freaking out, didn't know who to call. I needed to talk to someone. Something told me, call Amber. Awe, my sweet friend! Someone I never really thought I would turn to in time of tragedy. But God is good! He has placed Amber in my life and she thinks I've helped her, but what she doesn't know is that she's helped me just as much!
ANYWAYS... with past history, I'm guestimating we have until the end of March to move. This past week has been rough and I seriously went to where I was a year ago, mentally. Like a drug addict, looking for a fix. Driving all around town for 'for rent' signs.
I've heard God telling me, "trust me, I have it all under control. Stop looking, I'm going to bring to you. Just like this last house, I have a blessing for you."
I don't know what He's doing, but I know what His word says...I'm trust Him with ALL my heart & lean not, on my own understanding. His ways are NOT my ways. He has a plan and a purpose for my life.
It took some drilling into my head, but after a few days and some people lifting me up in prayer, I have a peace about me. A joy that is undescribable and can onlybe from Him. Now to remain in that joy, continue to trust in Him and KNOW, beyond a shadow of a.doubt that He is working in my family's favor.
I will keep ya'll updated!
~Melissa

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Yay for LA!

2011-03-05T11:21:00.001-08:00

We have been through the ringer since the beggining of december and we just had the icing put on the cake. ‹ will be in another blog post.
Anyhow, Jose and I decided it was time to take a trip with our babies and just get away from "reality" for a day. So we are heading LA!
We do this every so often, we'll pack up and head to the Guatemalan bakery, eat us some authentic Guatemalan food, buy us some pan, and take something new home that I can learn to cook for my babies. I love that we have something close enough to home that we can instill their Guatemalan traditions, heritage, whatever. It's important to me that my babies know where theycome from and some traditions.
So here we go...
I posted some pics of us driving. I will be taking pics while out there and share them with you.
Have a great day & know, God has it all under control!
~Melissa

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Out of the nose of babes...

2011-02-01T08:25:00.001-08:00

So yesterday was, well a day! Delayna didn't sleep well, I got about 4 hours of interrupted sleep, I was vomited on, cried on, boogers were wiped on me, coughed on and the list is just never ending. Amidst my poor little pneumonia girl I had to pay bills, finish getting my right offs done for my taxes, call my mots girls (which one is quite the talker and is going to be fun ;-)), and clean. Oh and due to the vomiting, I had an extra 3 loads of mandatory washing to do.
Well during my crazy day, I went to lay Delayna down to sleep and she was complaining her nose her. I couldn't figure out what her problem was. So I had her blow, nope still crying, got up, turned on the light, looked in her nose...low and behold, there was a HUGE white chunk in there.
I tried getting it out alone, but she kept turning her head. I seriously thought I was going to have to go back to urgent care. I came down, told my mom and told her she's going to have to help me, or it's off we go. *my mom has an issue with Delayna screaming and crying...she hates it and that's why I was afraid of her holding*
So my mom held her down while I took the tweezers and pulled out a chunk of a baby wipe. It was probably a quarter of the wipe! This picture doesn't do justice, I should have put something there to compare the size.
Anyways, that came out of the nose of "my babe" ;-)
Thanking God that today is a new day!

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Pneumonia Girl

2011-01-31T08:32:00.001-08:00

I took Berry to urgent care last night and after a few tests, x-rays and 3 hours, we found out our girl has pneumonia. She's coughing non-stop, not sleeping and just miserable. Here she is watching Word World.

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My boy...

2011-01-29T17:06:00.001-08:00

I'm sitting here looking at pics on facebook of my baby boy. There's just something about him that brings me so much joy and years that fill my eyes.
He's at his first quinceñera tonight, and as he made his plans I started to question myself. He initially planned on staying at his friend Marcelino's house. But then the more I thought about it, I had concerns. I know quinces and I know there will be alcohol and yes, even possibly drugs.
It's not that I don't trust my boy, I do, but I've been there and done that. Temptations rears up like a vicious lion, and my boy being as popular as he is, of course will have to protect his reputation.
So I change his plans and he won't be going tio his friends and I will be picking him up. Anthony is such an awesome kid. He has an amazing head on his shoulders, he's amazingly driven and loves life. One mistake could cost him. I tell him that allllll the time, but he's a teenager and of course "knows everything".
So mean 'ol mama that I am, I'm not letting him spend the night, but I allowed him to go to the party. I pray the holy spirit walks with him, protects him and quickens him to any senseless act he may do or think of doing.
I love my boy beyond words. He continues to amaze me. One day he will make an amazing husband and loving father.
Until then, my job is never through. And I will proudly be "the mean mom".

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Kee Kee Wosabeww

2011-01-27T10:31:00.001-08:00

I was doing laundry this morning and Delayna is in there laughing at Kee Kee Wosabeww. I go in there and she's starring at the washer machine. Silly kitty!

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Mama's chichi's

2011-01-26T13:35:00.001-08:00

Just had to share a picture. Ever since Delayna stopped nursing, she would have to still have her "chichi". She has a habit of putting her hand into my shirt and just testing it on my chest. I wanted to share, because it won't be something that she'll do forever and I wanted to remember it...

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2011 Winter Formal

2011-01-22T19:14:00.000-08:00

AJ, Ant &Jake, my three soccer boys going to winter formal. I must say, I am truly blessed to have such awesome boys in my life!

Happy Birthday Bewwy

2011-01-21T22:09:00.001-08:00

Bobo rubbed cupcake in her face.

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Hellooooo There!!!

2011-01-21T19:35:00.001-08:00

Wow, I have really been neglecting you, now haven't I? Sorry, was never my intention, but you see, I lost my internet and haven't been on my computer.
Anyhow, I have been told to start blogging some things, so I need to be obedient and start putting stuff on here.
Fair warning, some things are going to be published "private", I have one person on my private list, and if you'd like to be on that list, let me know.
I will also be having a give away coming up here. But before I do that, I want to know that I have enough people following/reading my blog to even do it.
So just leave a comment and let me know if your here :)
Here's to hearing more from me!!!

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She needs a clip

2010-12-24T20:49:00.001-08:00

Jose got sick of her hair, so he put a Twix-it in her hair...LOL

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Mama, Papa me go wunning

2010-12-23T16:06:00.001-08:00

Jose has been off for quite a few weeks now. He got ants in his pants and decided to start running.
So this morning, Jose was getting ready to go run and Delayna wanted to go with him. She kept trekking him, Papa me go wunning. It was too cute!
So I told Jose to take her in her stroller...she's so stinken cute, she went and got her baby stroller. Isn't she the cutest!?!
Needless to say, she didn't get to go with her papa :-(

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True friendship...

2010-12-18T15:12:00.001-08:00

Today was the final playoffs for soccer. Adriana's team was fighting for first place against the Elmo's Gone Bad, which also happens to be a team with two of her closest friends. Due to the rain, the region decided to go into penalty kicks instead of postponing the games once again.
I received a text from one of Adriana's friends talking smack to me about bringing our game, etc.
Anyways we went out in the rain and faced the team. It was extremely tight going both ways, but in the end the DYNAMITE'S walked away taking the title of first place with a score of 3-2.
Our girls were stoked, of course. But the poor EGB were just heart broken :( As I watched our girls jumping around celebrating, I saw my little go to her friend, Davi (who is from the EGB) wrap her arms around her and hug her as she cried. It truly made my heart melt, cry, and just be proud of my daughter.
To see that she took her self out of the equation to console her friend was awesome!
So now both teams move forward to the Regional Playoffs in Hemet. Can't wait to see how our girls progress!

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Curious

2010-11-22T23:57:00.000-08:00

I'm reading a lot on Mike and Brittany's wall. Things that he's writting to Micah, things that are being said to them, poems, sayings, scripture.
I don't know if they are doing anything with all of these, but I want to know your opinion...
I want to compile all of this and maybe put it in a book for them. Do you think that would be okay? How would you feel if someone did this for you?
I'm thinking, it's facebook and it's going to eventually be gone. This may be memories they will want to keep.
Tell me your opinion, PLEASE!

30 days of Thankfulness ~Day 22

2010-11-22T23:39:00.000-08:00

Okay, so today I'm thankful for transportation (specifically my expedition) and once again my husband, kids, niece and nephew. That should cover for the 4 days I was away =)
My Honey got home early today. When he got here, he helped me clean the kitchen, went up and cleaned our bedroom and then we all went off on our adventures.
Jose and I took Anthony, Adriana, Sarah, Devin, Dominic & Delayna out to Target, Sports Chalet, Sports Authority, Sam's Club and Burlington.
I do have to admit, we do have the funnest time together! I'm so thankful I have my expedition to tote all of us around in too!
so that's it for now...

30 days of Thankfulness ~4 days behind

2010-11-22T23:05:00.000-08:00

Well, with everything that happened, I just couldn't get on here and be the "happy Melissa" that I normally am.
Sure, I was thankful for all of my blessings, but like in my previous post How Do You Do It? I just couldn't understand how to function "as normal" when someone so close to me was hurting and dealing with, in my opinion, one of the worse tragedies anyone would ever have to deal with.
I was angry, confused, hurt, torn.
I went to church yesterday and Pastor Todd's message was so dead on! He let us know, it's okay to be angry at God and let him know your angry. It's okay to hurt and not understand. Basically all of my emotions were validated. It's okay for me to be feeling this way.
Tragedies are hard to deal with! We don't understand why things happen like they do. Why they happen when they do. Or how we are going to move on from where were at.
He shared an awesome message and I wish I could post it..Oh wait, let me see if I can..nope, no luck.
Anyhow, just wanted to let you know why I haven't been posting. I just felt as though i couldn't post anything. My heart was aching too deeply and the anger was beyond words.
So, look for tonight and I will finish the month's off.

How do you do it?

2010-11-20T23:03:00.000-08:00

I'm sitting here in front of frugos waiting for everyone to show up. I've been having such a blah day, having the thoughts running through my head of the heartache my dear friends are going through. How do I function like normal?
I felt guilty posting about my son making the HS soccer team last night on facebook. How can I be happy when the are mourning so deeply? How do I function like a normal person when they have a ton of blocks sitting on their chest.
I wish there was something I could do our say to soothe the pain...I know God is the only one, but how do you function as normal without feeling guilty about it?
I'm beside myself over this tragedy...And as I sit with the radio on, a song came on the radio...
STRENGTH WILL RISE AS WE WAIT UPON THE LORD, HE WILL NOT FAINT, HE WON'T GROW WEARY, HE'S THERE TO COMFORT THOSE ON NEED...STRENGTH WILL RISE!
NO ONE CAN MEASURE THE DEPTH OF HIS LOVE, THE STRENGTH OF HIS HAND.
MIKE & BRITT, I PRAY GOD GIVES YOU THE STRENGTH YOU NEED!

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Test drive

2010-11-19T23:09:00.001-08:00

AFTER A VERY LONG TIME OF WAITING AND WANTING. I GOT A DROID!!! NOT JUST ANY DROID, BUT THE DROID X! IT'S SUPPOSED TO BE SIMILAR TO THE iPhone. We shall see. Now lets see if rhis is gonna work.

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Broken

2010-11-18T21:11:00.000-08:00

The other day I blogged about something going on that I couldn't share at the time. Not that I'm at liberty to share now, but I'm calling out for everyone to pray.
Our youth pastors, Mike & Brittany have a baby boy Micah who was about 4 months old. On tuesday evening, Brittany went in to check on him and found him non responsive and blue. She immediately called 911 and started CPR.
They were able to revive baby Micah at the hospital...I don't know all of the details, but I was told that Wednesday they did a CT scan and didn't detect brain activity.
Our church stood together and prayed all day and our church called for a community prayer that night. We all know God's hand is mighty and His works are all powerful. We believed for a miracle. Surrounding this family in prayers.
This evening I received the following Prayer Request Update:

Baby Micah passed away at 6:30 this evening

after a valiant fight.

Pastor Mike and Britt are strong in faith but naturally grieving.

I will pass on further information on Sunday morning.

Please allow them privacy and time to mourn,

They feel and appreciate your love and support and

Your sensitivity is needed at this time.

Thank you for being a wonderful church family!

P.T.

I am so broken & beside myself! I wish I could wrap this family in my arms. I honestly don't know what to say or do...What do you say or do at this time?
I read the email and just sobbed at my desk. I couldn't even get up to tell Jose. I went to the room and my mom heard my wales from downstairs. I told them and we all just came together. So broken for this family.
I don't understand why God allows things like this to happen; or if He even does.
I've had friends loose their babies to miscarriages or stillborn and it's boggled me...WHY?
A parent should never have to bury their baby.
Precious Micah, your in the arms of an angel now. Your mommy, daddy and sister will miss you more than words can say. God has you tucked under his arm, holding you tight. I pray that the Lord's peace will sweep over Mike, Britt & Eden. They say time heals all things, but I don't believe it does. Micah, you will always be remembered. Your beautiful curly hair, how you looked identical to your daddy, your teeny tiny body and even the struggle to find clothes that fit you.
Father God, I pray that you bring peace, comfort, understanding and healing to this family. That you would allow those that come into their presence to be sensitive. That you would send exactly who and what they need at this time. That your angels would wrap this mama up in their wings and that she would find comfort in you. We know we are all timed, but don't always understand why it happens when it does. Heal these hearts father.
In Jesus Name, Amen!

30 days of Thankfulness ~Day 18

2010-11-18T20:28:00.000-08:00

Today I'm thankful for my home. I really love the house I'm in! I've enjoyed my previous houses, loved my neighborhoods, but we always out grew them and were uncomfortable. We lived within our means so to speak.
But I really do love my house I'm in! There is NOTHING that I dont' like about it. Except how hard wood floor really are to keep clean without the proper tool(s) and the unknown of what is going to happen with it.
I need to decorate it and put some pictures up, but I have a fear that if I do that then something might happen and I'll have to take it all down and remove 'my mark'.
Must close for the night...

30 days of Thankfulness ~Day 17

2010-11-17T20:04:00.000-08:00

Well, I had all kinds of stuff I was debating to put on today's blog, but with the turn of events from today, I have nothing.
My emotions are so out of whack and i have so much going on in my brain right now I don't even know how to feel.
Nothing I can share right now, but just please be in prayer for some of our friends.
guess I'm just thankful for this blog to openly ask for prayer and my children. I'm holding them a little closer tonight!

30 days of Thankfulness ~Day 16

2010-11-16T20:28:00.000-08:00

Today's Thankfulness is easy peasy, mac n cheesy =)
So a little background to today's post. Anthony has been sick since about Saturday with a cough and his ear bothering him. He went to school sicker than a dog yesterday and even went to practice, but just couldn't get up and do it today.
I took the other 2 to school, came home and got him an appointment with his Doctor. I took him in and when I went to check him in, they told me I didn't have insurance for him. I was shocked, I hadn't a clue, REALLY! So I told the clerk I would call the insurance company to see what was going on. About 20 mins into calls, Delayna was being a monster and I told Ant to take her down and that I would sort it all out at the house. We got into the elevator and by the time we got to the bottom, the receptionist was there waiting for us. She said, "The nurse told me not to let you go." I explained to her what was going on, but she just basically told me that the Doctor is going to see him, even if I don't get the insurance worked out today.
We went to the expedition and I waited for another 20 mins and then sent him up to wait in the waiting room while I finished the call. I got up there again and went to the same receptionist. She explained to me that they can see him for as little as $27. I was shocked, I thought it was near $100 for sure. The nurse came out and talked to Ant while I talked to the receptionist. She said that it's basically up to the Doctor and what she wants to charge us. So after a while, the nurse came out and informed us that the Doctor is going to see Ant and not charge me...WOW!
I was floored! We went in and he was seen, then they informed us that we can go to stater bros to get the prescription filled for around $4.
I headed over there and turned in his prescription and explained to the man behind the counter everything that happened 2 hours earlier with the insurance. He said it would be about 20 mins. We left and then returned. I picked it up and asked how much, and he just said, "Don't worry about it."
WOWEE!!!! My boy was seen and given a prescription all for FREE!
So today my Thankfulness goes out to the Medical Facility, the Doctor, nurse and receptionist and Stater Bros. UNBELIEVABLE!!!

30 days of Thankfulness ~Day 15

2010-11-15T21:24:00.000-08:00

yes, day 15 is TS3! Ant begged me to rent this from the redbox on Saturday night. So I did. What happened next was not what I expected!
We got home and I made pizza. He popped on the movie, grabbed his little brother and started singing and dancing to the opening of the movie...you know, "You got a friend in me."
Awwe what the hay...here's the video

We have watched it 3 times since renting it saturday night...Anthony has popped it in each time. I'm thankful for a movie that can bring my sweet boy out though all of that rough/tough guy stuff.
Not to mention, he cries EVERYTIME Andy gives Woody to the little girl at the end :'-(

30 days of Thankfulness ~Day 14

2010-11-15T21:02:00.000-08:00

Today I am thankful for my church, church family & Pastor Todd!
Okay, so I'm posting this on Monday, I know, a day late, but it's still my day 14 thankfulness.
I have got to have one of the best Pastors EVER! Really! I was actually at McDonald's today with Jose and the 2 littles when we ran into one of Ant's old soccer coaches. We got to talking and he asked, "You guys are still going to Legacy, right?" We were like, "Of course!" The he started talking about Pastor Todd. He even referred to him as 'Pastor Todd' when he was talking about his team playing against Todd's soccer team. I thought that was funny.
Anyways, my church is such a loving church! We are growing by leaps and bounds. The greatest part about that is that we are able to reach out to the needy. We have a "new" ministry kicking up called Project 911. It's focus is to bring families back together and have children in a loving environment. As a child that was raised in a 'hard life' my heart is just so appreciative for what the Pedrozas are doing with their team. No, I'm not a part, right now, just because I really do have so much going on and I need to step back and allow God to show me what step I need to take, if any at this point in my life. Anyway, back to my church...
Pastor Todd really knows how to bring the word, and I never walk away from a service empty. We also have great associate pastors that are truly in tune with the Holy Spirit. Last week, P.T. was gone and Pastor Ken took over. I was told that first service last week was all Praise & Worship, that's awesome for our leaders to allow the spirit to move. And if it's moving and staying in P&W then so be it...sometimes, it's what our spirit needs!
Second service, P&W was awesome too, but then Pastor Terry came up and brought a word. Then Pastor Ken came up and brought a word. God truly ministered in both services, obviously.
This week, I went, not wanting to, because I was on day 3 of a MASSIVE migraine! I wanted to stay in bed, but I couldn't...It's just not me. I feel as though, if I can go to my kids' soccer games on Saturday and do other things, then God is definitely worth it.
Anyways, P.T. was talking about praying over our spouses, children, etc. Also claiming our blessings. God has been moving and shaking me and once again confirmed more things to me. But on top of that, Jose grabbed a hold of me and started to pray over me. Just like PT told us to do for each other. I couldn't hear what he was saying, but I know what he was praying over me for. We then went out for a bit, then back home. While I laid in bed later that afternoon, Jose was praying over again. After I woke up, I swear, my headache was gone and I felt like a new woman!
I praise god for giving Jose and I a church, church family and Pastor to teach us all that we have been taught. We have had people come up beside us and stand with us through some of the most troubling times. I love my family, undoubtedly, but my church family is probably closer to me than my blood.
Like the bible says, God will give us friends that stick closer to us than a brother. It's so true and I am overly thankful for my church!

30 days of Thankfulness ~Day 13

2010-11-13T20:39:00.000-08:00

With my daughter screaming upstairs, I've gotta make it quick!
Today I'm thankful for craziness. I can't go into much detail right now, because my mom is buggin, kids are fighting & Delayna is screaming...But without all of this, it wouldn't be "My Life"!
Now back to my regular scheduled program of "tending to everyone's needs, but my own."
TTYS!

30 days of Thankfulness ~Day 12

2010-11-13T20:27:00.000-08:00

So last night I was stricken with a MASSIVE MIGRAINE! I sat at the top of the football bleachers crying because I was in so much pain and couldn't go anywhere. We finally left the varsity game at half time and came home, drugged myself up and went to bed. So this is why I'm posting late...AGAIN!

I would have to give Day 12 to my fRaZzLeD fEmAlEs!
We had an AWESOME morning with our bible study! I was able to open up and share some things with some women that have taken the step to allow God to change what's inside of every single one of us.
We have made a bond and are opening up to friendship, allowing God to build us up.
God has positioned me in a place in my life, that I never thought I would be...And it's just being ME!
These women confirmed somethings that God has spoken to me.
They opened up and confided in me. Showing me that I have built a trust. I saw that they, just like me, have been hurt in relationships. That we are all in the same boat, learning who/what/when/where we can trust.
I'm excited, because God is going to continue this. I see His hand working on all of us and knowing that we are going to move into the next one, excites me.
WE are planning things out, WE are working together, WE are growing & WE are learning.
This is a group effort and we all bring so much to the table each week. I'm so blessed God has "given me" these women to learn from and with. I can't wait to see the future!
Thank you, each one!

30 days of Thankfulness ~Day 11

2010-11-11T22:17:00.000-08:00

Had some catching up to do for the days I was knocked down & out. So, these are gonna be mighty fast.
Today I would like to say, "I am thankful for our technology."
Sounds stupid, but really think about it. We have Facebook that allows us to connect with people all over the world, literally. I've connected with friends and family members that I lost contact with just because I didn't take the time to call and connect. It's not always easy, but technology has made it to where I can text, facebook, email, blog, etc and my family knows what I'm up to and doing.
It has been great knowing what is going on in others lives and others being able to know what's going on in mine.
K, that's all...Until tomorrow, reach out and text someone =)

30 days of Thankfulness ~Day 10

2010-11-11T22:10:00.000-08:00

Happy Birthday to all of the Marines out there!!!
I can't even begin to express my thankfulness for all of the veteran's that have put their lives on the line for our future.
I have many veterans in my family and God has blessed me with many more in my life.
I respect them for all they have done and those that continue to fight for our country. Our country was founded on God and even though so many try to take God out of the equation, our men and women fight daily to keep our country grounded.
So today, I salute all of my veterans and say "THANK YOU!"

30 days of Thankfulness ~Day 9

2010-11-11T22:07:00.000-08:00

I'm thankful for injuries. AAAWWWKKKWARD, I know, but I was injured on day 9 and did nothing but sleep and lay around.
I will be truthful, it drove me to insanity and I could only semi-sit for 2 day, but I got some much needed rest that my body and mind needed.
I always say, "God has to knock me on my butt for me to relax." And it's the truth!

30 days of Thankfulness ~Day 8

2010-11-08T20:07:00.000-08:00

Hmmm, I have a coin to flip for today =)
But, I think my friends are going to take this day...
I have been blessed with some really good ones, if I say so myself!
I want to point each one out individually, but if I did that, I would never end this post and I may miss someone and I don't want to hurt anyone's feelings.
But there is one special friend I want to brag on...
One that's been in my life for a couple centuries, one that has been through the dirt with me and still loves me for who *I* am, one that has loved my mom and brother through all of their crap and never judged or condemned them, one that has probably known more about me than even my husband (no, I don't tell him everything...there are things that just don't need to be said).
This friend has been more of a friend and more like a sister to me, the one I never had. No matter where life has taken us, the roads that have separated us, circumstances that have taken our lives down different paths, we still come together like we were never separated.
We went to school together, got drunk together, did things together only her and I will take to the grave.
We've laughed together, cried together, mourned together, been frustrated over the same family members, had our babies together, graduated Jr. High and High School together, watched our babies graduate Jr. High together.
We've both walked away from the Lord and church, while our moms prayed our butts back in. We understand each other, hold each other up, give advice to each other without condemnation on what we did.
She's held me up in some of my darkest hours, and walked with me through some of my hardest years.
Remember those heart necklaces that half said BEST and the other half said FRIENDS. I can honestly say, she has a piece of my heart and tattooed on it it says, "Best Friend".
I haven't always been the 'best' friend that I should be, but we both know, we are there, no matter what!

This special person would be Jessica Yvonne Hale (amongst her many married names =) Love ya Jess...LOL!)
I remember the day I met you. Your mom and my mom picked us up from school in her little funky green car. Since that car, our lives have taken us down some memorial paths. No matter what, through thick and thin, we still stand, bonded as if that day we were born to be sisters.
I don't say it enough, nor do I show it enough. But I love you!
You have a piece of my heart forever.
Here is a pic of Jessica, Cera, Me & Ant at their Jr. High Graduation (remind me to look for our graduation pics...I have them somewhere!)

30 days of Thankfulness ~Day 7

2010-11-08T18:23:00.000-08:00

I just want to say a simple...
I am so thankful for my blessings! God has truly blessed me beyond measure! I have 4 awesome children that can drive me to insanity, but continually put a smile on my face and fill me with so much contentment.
I have a husband who is just awesome...He's already received his spot light.
I have a mom who loves me, supports me, and raised me to be a heck of a woman...even though we butt heads more than we get along.
I have great friends, women and people in my life.
Many talents that God has allowed me to use to bless his children with.
I can go on & on...but you get the point.

30 days of Thankfulness ~Day 6

2010-11-06T22:57:00.000-07:00

There are quite a few things I can dedicate today to, but I'm taking this opportunity to share my thankfulness for being part of an incredible organization.
One that cares about the kids as much as they do.
One that truly appreciates the volunteerism that is put out to make it all work.
One that focus' on the growth more than the 'win'.
This would be AYSO.
I've been part of AYSO for ohhhh about 10 years now...WOW, that's a long time!
I've seen 3 Regional Commissioners come and go.
I've watched a little tiny soccer league turn into a massive community that has finally made it's name around local towns.
We've gone from oh about a total of 30 teams to who knows how many teams at this point. I know we had close or over 1,000 kids playing this year.
We've gone from a board who made up the whole region to our board being an intricate part of the region and only being about a 10th of the parents.
We've learned what works, and what doesn't work.
We've made Region of The Year, beating about 900 other regions.
We out grew our region this year and had the U16 and above playing over at the High School.
We have grown to be families that really are part of a HUMONGOUS family.
Tonight we had our awards ceremony and I was truly teary eyed being grateful to be part of something that touches so many lives of not only the children, but families. Bringing them/us together with a common interest.
I've made so many great life-long friends, that I've learned so much from!
I'm kinda sad that my position may be eliminated from the board. As busy as I am and how great it would be to free myself up from it, it really makes me sad to think I may not have a position on the board.
I'm proud to be a SOCCER MAMA & part of AYSO Region 641...All that have had a part, have a part and will be coming on. It's a life changing experience that I wish everyone could be a part of!

30 days of Thankfulness ~Day 5

2010-11-06T22:27:00.000-07:00

Today's post is dedicated to my baby boy...Anthony Jose Herrera
As much as I'd like to strangle him lately, he's still my baby boy!
So, tonight we went to his Friday Night Football Game yh7ujiu7jmukm8uk,iink,b8iubvjubu, hyn nh nhngh gn nhgtb bgnjbnjnjum
And that's what I mean by wanting to strangle him, as that would be his doing...
Anywho, he truly makes me one proud Mama! Tonight's game he not only walked away with a 52-6 winning game, but he also made captain!!!!
He has really embarrassed his position in football and is really excelling in it. He is also working hard to keep his grades up. His coach has had him going to study hall everyday after school before he goes to pracitce.
His new interest is wrestling, but we will see what happens. His soccer friends are really wanting him to go and try out for the goalie position on the HS team. Which, we all know hands down, he kicks butt in that goal box. He has no fear and for a majority keep those balls out of the box.
Now about Anthony, my baby...
He is the sweetest big brother, he truly is. He loves his role as a big brother and knows that he has 3 little ones looking up to him. He's not the perfect kid, but he really isn't a bad kid, never has been. He loves his little brother and baby sister. And recently has been embracing Adriana. For some reason, those two have finally clicked! He even started training her for spring select. He wants her to get out there and kick butt!
I mentioned this before, but after every football game Delayna wants her Bobo. So I will take her down to him and he will call for her to come out to him. What a precious, precious memory they will both cherish as they grown older.
Dominic and him shared a room for a little over 2 years. When we moved into this new house, Domi got his own room. He was soooo sad and didn't want to sleep alone. But he's adjusted and got used to it. But there have been a few times that I will get up in the morning to wake him up and find him in Ant's room on the floor with his pillows & blankets. There have been about 2 times that I have gone in looking for him and couldn't find him. After searching the house, I found him tucked into bed with Ant, snuggled up next to him. Ant told me he went in there and said, "Bobo, I had a bad dweam, can I sweep wif you?" AWE, HOW SWEET! Ant just pulled the covers up and tucked his baby brother in next to him.
This boy melts my heart!
He has the greatest aspirations of becoming a professional football player and is very focused...just to keep him there.
He's a good kid with a huge heart! One day, I will be proud to announce this kid will be going on to the NFL!
Here's a photo of him goin up as captain for his game last night #33

Interruption

2010-11-05T22:06:00.000-07:00

I interrupt this 30Days of Thanksgiving to bring you this announcement...

I'M TOO EXHAUSTED TO POST TONIGHT!

Yeah, I really am. I'm feeling sick I'm so over tired. So I will catch up tomorrow. Have an awesome night all!

30 days of Thankfulness ~Day 4

2010-11-04T22:00:00.000-07:00

Today is my cousin Robin's First Angelversary (the day she was called home to our Heavenly Father). I couldn't take this post and give it to anyone/thing else but her.
Only God knows how very thankful I am for that girl.
I don't know what's going to come out in this post, but just bear with me and know I'm doing it threw tears.
Robin left us at just 30 years 2 months and 15 days (if i did the math right).
If you knew Robin, you knew she was living her life to please God.
Robin was born August 20, 1979, just shy of one year after I was born and just about 2 weeks before Lourdes was born. Talk about an adorable baby! Of course, I don't remember much, since I was just a babe myself, but my family likes to share stories. Robin was diagnosed with Cystic Fibrosis at a very young age. The doctors of course put a time frame on her life, but God had MUCH GREATER plans!
Robin was married to Jason. After a few years of marriage, she gave birth to Christopher. Funny how that went, because Robin had Chris, Gail had Devin and I had Dominic all within a month separation.
Robin had a double lung transplant in December of 2007, after a very long battle of collapsed lungs...but, unknown to anyone, there was a problem. She had some issues and was looking into a re-transplant, but God now put a frame on her life clock. He knew exactly what he was doing and Robin trusted in Him all along.

Like I said, Robin left us at the young age of 30, but spiritually she was pretty much in her 80's!
This girl was a rock, or at least that's what she let everyone see. In her illness, pain, suffering, etc. it was her goal to reach out and touch someone else.
Robin and I weren't very close growing up but, with age, marriage and children, our lives take alternate routes and priorities, focuses, etc change.
Robin and I talked ALOT! I could honestly say, we talked at least once a week in some form of communication.
That girl got me through some rough patches. She was ALWAYS there! She would put herself aside to pray, guide, speak words of encouragement to you.
I never got to tell her, but she taught me to pray with others. To stand up for who I am and not be ashamed. To use my god-given abilities to reach out and touch a life in need.
In many areas, I am the woman I am today, spiritually because of Robin!
I swore a year ago today that i would stand up and change my ways with my physical health.
I also swore I would run a marathon, something she always wanted to do and was blessed to do at one point.
But, I've fallen away and let things get in my way.
today, I am vowing again...
Robin, I will pick myself up, dust myself off, and get back on track. I will run a marathon in your remembrance and let those know who Robin was and still is.
Your stories will be told and your light will forever shine. You touched not only me, but so many people in your short life. You stood up for who you were, what you believed in and most importantly our God.
Proverbs 31:30 says "a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised"...Robin you will always be praised!
I love you and miss you more than words could ever describe. You've left a wonderful man and awesome little boy, along with many lives you touched, who will carry out your stories...forever you will be praised!

This is a pic of Robin, Jason & Chris hiking in June of 2008, after her transplant, looking AMAZING!

30 days of Thankfulness ~Day 3

2010-11-03T21:38:00.000-07:00

Well today, hands down has to go to my baby girl...
Adriana Winette, It's her 12th birthday today!
I can honestly say, I can remember the day she was born. Going in the night before, into a dark room at San Gorgonio Hospital. Laying there while they start my petocin and watching TV. It was a looooooong dark night! But I remember the next morning, clear as day! The sun finally broke through the early morning darkness. I had an intense sensation to do something, but didn't know what. I remember looking over at Kim and she asked me if I was ok, all I could do was nod. The nurse came in to check on me and she asked if I was ready to push. That was it, I needed to push! I didn't know this, because Ant was taken via c-section. So, push I did...in all the wrong places! I remember pushing so hard and not doing anything. I was so upset and frustrated. I finally figured it out and after an hour of pushing my baby girl was born.
GORGEOUS! She truly was (I don't say that about all of my kids, honestly. Dominic was not cute when he was born!). Jose and Kim were there with me, the room now was so bright from the sun shining in. I don't remember too much after having her, except trying to nurse her with Kim sitting there and me not being embarrassed of everything being exposed. And my stomach growling so loud the nurses were laughing. I hated, no despised pancakes...BUT it was pancakes I wanted and pancakes I got!!! Ever since, I'm a lover of pancakes =)

So back to my Thankfulness...
Adriana is an awesome girl! Anyone will tell you, she is helpful, loving, funny, an airhead, a great all around girl.
She is who she is and she is TOTALLY okay with that.
She excels in soccer and I literally have coaches tracking me down to be put on their teams. Just recently she was invited to play in a tournament Thanksgiving weekend.
Her grades are awesome! She currently has 3 A's, 2 B's and an F (that is a LONG story, but let's just say, it's not her fault and Mama will be fighting this one!).
She is a wonderful big sister to her brother and sister. It took her a while to come around, after all she was our Princess for so long, it was hard to let the title go.
She's an awesome little sister. Supports and cheers her brother on. She's gotta keep on his good side, he's got a reputation =0
She does color guard, is on the praise and worship team with our youth program, is willing to help in any area she can.
Her goal in life is to become a doctor and live in Malibu.
But, her biggest ambition is to feed the hungry, cloth the needy and house the homeless. She has such a deep sympathetic heart to this ministry and I KNOW the Lord is going to bless her works as long as she keeps her eyes upon Him!
So, after all that, I'm going to leave you with the most resent pic of her

Isn't she beautiful! Al natural and has no want to be what she's not...

30 days of Thankfulness ~Day 2

2010-11-02T20:17:00.000-07:00

Well, I wanted to brag on my son today, because I was kinda gonna go down a family line & I'm a little neurotic like that to do things in order....BUT....I've decided to take another route.

Today I am thankful for my freedom, liberty and God given right to VOTE! Some people take this for granted and being totally honest I didn't start until last year. I was very intimidated by it all and not until someone revealed some things to me did I finally see my privilege in it.
Being a woman in the 20th century, it truly is a privilege for me to vote.
I'm not all political, like some people in my family. But, I do listen, pay attention and even sometimes do my homework.
I was asked today what party I supported and to be honest, I can't say that I do. I know my beliefs and I prayerfully make my decisions on what suits me.
So, with that I leave you with...

30 days of Thankfulness ~Day 1

2010-11-01T21:11:00.000-07:00

My friend Sandy started this today on facebook...I took it a bit farther and started a 30 day blog post. I hope you can join me! If you do, let me know and I will go read & support your blogging efforts!

Has to go to my #1~Jose Roberto Herrera
My husband has to be the most awesome man I know!
He has taken a journey with me for the past 20 years.
He blessed me with my first born almost 15 years ago and since has blessed me with 3 additional.
He loves me threw my brokenness and rejoices with me threw my accomplishments.
He dreams with me, supports me, and most of all stands by me!
He works hard daily and supports his family and keeps me home to raise them.
He's his kids #2 cheerleader (come on, you know I'm their #1), a coach, and helper.
He's a prayer warrior and covers his family daily in them.
He's a child of the Most High Father and through his relationship with the Lord can love his family to the capacity that he does.
This list could probably go on all day, but you get the point!
Today, I am thankful for my Husband!

Not so great news

2010-10-04T22:24:00.000-07:00

Well today was the day that Anthony got the news weather he would be pulled up to the JV team for the BIG Beaumont vs Banning football game this Friday night.
When he called me to pick him up, he didn't sound so great. Jose brought him home and when he walked in and didn't really want to eat what I made for dinner, I knew something was wrong.
Jose texted me and told me that he is really upset...the coaches didn't choose him to play for the game this Friday.
So i asked him and he told me he didn't make it. He told me who all was being brought up to play and that the coaches didn't choose him.
My poor boy is super bummed. But it's also a lesson he needs to learn. This is his first season/year/EVER playing football. He's already first string and the coach is very impressed with him. He needs to know that he is doing AWESOME for where he is at right now and not making it for the "Big game" is ok.
So, I'm going to plan that we all head out Friday night to support our Boys In Blue! try to make it a good night.

Beaumont vs Yucaipa-Freshman Football

2010-10-01T21:01:00.000-07:00

Game #5 and only the second one I've been able to watch. I got to the game just before half time. Walking onto the field, Beaumont is making a Touchdown! Always exciting to watch your team doing that =)
I have Jose on the phone and am going around the bend to give him the score. I see Home: 27 and then I look at Away: 00...WHAT? REALLY? 00?
After getting over the shock of the score, Yucaipa is doing the return kick off. Ant plays in this play and I'm looking for him. I see a guy take down the Yucaipa guy who has the ball, but I can't see who it is. Then I see 3 guys down on the ground and who I thought was my son, being tackled.
Come to find out, the announcer states, "Number 33, Herrera, for the take-down".
WHAT!?!?!?! That would be MY BOY!
I get to the bleachers and hear again...#33, Herrera for the tackle...WHOOP WHOOP!
The game went on and it was really a tough game. Yucaipa played their hearts out, but Beaumont took it...
50-0
Our boys are 5 & 0!
I am one proud Mama!!!

I'm birthing

2010-09-17T18:40:00.001-07:00

Not in a physical form, but spiritual.
God placed in my heart years ago to have a women's bible study. I thought about it, looked into it, talked about, but it never happened. I was kinda bummed & sad, but it was alright. My whole goal is to be in God's will, not mine.
So for the past few months, God's been speaking to me. I believed, but also wanted it in His time, not mine. I didn't want to do anything in "Melissa's" strength or timing.
As I thought, questioned, prayed, seeked, I learned that I also pushed God away. Told him no, too many times, let depression come in, self insecurities, etc.
I was also going through some things, which I now see were growing pains. Stuff that I thought at times I would walk away from the "church" as a whole. Not that I wanted to, but was pushed to so many limits in so many ways, I was DONE!
As I pushed through, God spoke to me. He met me where I was at, in the pain, depression, fear, self doubt. I went to two different services. One that Pastor Todd taught & one Pastor Mike taught, at the end there was an alter call at both. I was at my breaking point, let it all out and God met me. He spoke to me through a couple of people, people who had NO IDEA what i was going through.
He then whispered to me, "your going to start your bible study. I want you to step out and trust in me. Don't look to the left or the right. I will put it into play, just move forward and open it up."
So, I put it out there. I first started with opening my home and inviting some of the ladies in my life. That went so well that it was asked that I do it again. So I did, this time it doubled in size!
I asked them if they would be interested in doing the bible study and the response was surprisingly great.
At this point I have 5-6 women who plan on attending.
God lead me to do The Frazzled Female bible study. He spoke it to me, and then my friend Sandy confirmed it...
Beginning October 1st (which coinsidentally enough is a Friday) I will be starting my bible study.
It hit me while I was doing the dishes...I'm going to be doing a bible study out of my home. Something my heart has desired for such a long time!

Interception & a TD

2010-09-17T18:19:00.000-07:00

Ant had game #2 tonight in Menifee playing against Herritage High School. Unfortunately I wasn't able to go because Little had Color Guard until 3:45 & Ant's game started at 4pm.
Just got a text and once again, Beaumont Freshman won...15-12.
Ant said he got an interception and almost made a touchdown! ACK, I'M SO FREAKING STOKED! My boy is doing so good in football. I am such a proud Mama!

I didn't post about this, but last Wednesday I ran into Ant's football coach. I stopped him to ask him about something else, but in the conversation he asked me about Ant.
He asked me if this was his first year playing. I told him it was. He stated, "he told me that, but I didn't believe him." He also went on to tell me that he is very impressed with Anthony. That his skills are up there with the kids that he's been coaching for 6-8 years. He expects Ant to be on the Varsity team if not next year, then his Jr. year for sure.
Coach Gabe Penna was telling me that he makes a list of his boys every season. He said he'll sit down and start writing down names as they come to his mind. Anthony was in the top 12...he was saying that's how impressed he is with him.
I'm just flabbergasted!!!!
My boy has a very promising future. Now to keep him focused and see that he has a lot at stake if he messes around.
God's hand is upon him either way!

UGH!

2010-09-09T10:52:00.000-07:00

I am SO stinken tired lately! I really don't know what's wrong with me. I have been going to sleep before 10pm every night and fighting to wake up by 6am...Granted, Delayna is still waking up 2-3 times a night, but still, WHAT THE HIZECK!?!?!
I went to go to my "Vitamin Guy" yesterday, but his store was closed. After posting on FB I found out that he moved shop. So I plan on hitting him up today to see what I can take, maybe some B12.
I need to get exercise back into my routine too. Maybe instead of taking a break and blogging, i could be working out! Anyways, just thought I'd come and complain...HA HA HA HA

The thoughts that run through my head

2010-09-05T22:26:00.000-07:00

I had a whole other topic & blog in my head, but with such an emotional day, I've seem to have lost it all.
Well this morning didn't start out all that great. I was woken up at 7am by Miss Dee...Mama was NOT ready to wake up. I saw Jose go out the door & close it. I tried calling to him to take Delayna so I could get some more sleep, but he didn't hear me. Dominic did, so he climbed up into the bed and I told him to get the remote and turn on the t.v. for him & Dee to watch cartoons. They sat for a bit, but Dee crawled down and opened the door. I thought she was going downstairs with Jose. So I turned over and tried to catch a few more ZZZ's. A few minutes later Dominic wakes me up and says, "Mama, look at what Delayna did to your computer!"
I look down and this is what I see...

Oh My! Was I furious!!! I took it downstairs to show Jose. My mood was NOT what it should have been. Yes, she's a baby, yes she was left unattended, yes I know she's busy...BUT, I was still pissed!
So Jose took it and started working on it to attempt fixing it.
I headed to the kitchen to clean and burn some steam, then upstairs to get ready for church.
We left all of the kids home. Jose had a friend here that spent the night, Dee was too sick to go in the nursery & Adi watched her for us.
We got to church & honestly, I was not in the best of moods. Besides my computer being torn to shreds, Jose & I learned that Ant's friend that was over was stoned out of his gourd when he was here last night. We had a long talk on the way to church & were just besides ourselves in what to do, how to handle it and wondering if our son had any part in it.
We went in & kinda just sat by ourselves up front. I greeted a few people, but wasn't in the mood. My mom came in and I talked to her about it.
Service started & there were new songs. Not that it's a bad thing, but it's hard to get into a true worship mode when you don't know the songs. Finally they played one that I knew and I was able to kinda get there.
Well then Pastor Mike was introduced & came up. I've only heard him preach to the youth, but I've heard that when he preaches to the adults, he's FIRED UP! I was expecting to get a word, but some of my own feelings were blocking my attention. Mike felt it, not just with me of course, but with the whole congregation. He took a moment to pray for the heaviness to be lifted, for our focus to be on what God has for us, etc. By then I was able to open up to what God had.
He had us go to the story of God healing the paralytic. He talked about our own lives and how we are crippled with fear. And how we need to be like those friends of the paralytic who fought to get him to Jesus, no matter what/how. We need to be like that and fight to get to Jesus, no matter what it takes!
God has really been dealing with me regarding fear. It's something that I have been crippled with for YEARS! In So many areas of my life. But, not many people would know that. I make things look easy, I look comfortable, I look ok. But you can't see what's going on inside. How I fight to talk, walk, move forward. I'm afraid of what they'll say, think, feel, judge, condemn, pass judgement, turn me down, tell me "no", the list goes on forever!
God really spoke to me through Pastor Mike this morning! I don't have my notes in front of me & I'm so fried at this point, I can't & won't get everything on here that i want to.
But, God has been dealing with me regarding so many things! Fear, moving me forward into what He has for me, learning my self worth, learning the power I have in and through Him, Friendships (who and what), bringing me back to my first love, bringing me back to His love for others and the list goes on!
I went up to the alter and weeped like a baby out to my Heavenly Father (something else he's been dealing with me. you see, I never had a father/daddy to love me. So even turning to my Heavenly Father, it's a challenge!). But I felt as though something broke off of me. Then the longer I sat there crying out to Him, I felt something creep in and tell me, "Everyone is watching you. Who is wondering what your crying about. Your supposed to be a leader & your up here crying about fear? People are judging you." And as i felt it creep in, I hear Pastor Todd take the mic and say the following..."welcome conviction...rebuke condemnation"
WOW, Thank You My Heavenly Father! And as I welcomed the conviction of my actions and rebuked the condemnation that I was putting upon myself, i was able to open another door to my heart.
I can't tell you how long I was up there crying out to God, being prayed over, have life & words spoken into me. But I can tell you, my Heavenly Father did a work! My face was covered in black make up, snot wiped from my nose and onto my pants, eyes burning like I was in a chlorine bath & head pounding from so many emotions and thoughts running through my head. All not physically great, but spiritually AWESOME!
I have SO much I need to work on, starting with ME! I have so much pain to work through, focus to change and love to allow in.
I pray that I can take this daily to God and that i would be awakened daily with a spirit from God. Remembering to seek Him first & daily!!!!

Then this evening PT ministered to the Youth Group regarding spiritual purity. All I can say is, "WOW, did he read Ant's book!" He spoke some powerful words into my boys life. God has been using situations to allow us to feed into Him what God says, does and commands. But for Ant to hear it from our Pastor, I believe it hit his core. I have yet to talk with him one on one, but God is working & I choose to believe that we have been going through a season for a reason!
CHANGE IS COMING
Hmmm, just found this & it spoke everything i've been thinking...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Lip2K4x2Mhg

Time

2010-09-04T19:41:00.000-07:00

It seems as though I don't have enough of it in a day, or at all lately! I just realized I haven't posted since school ended in July and here we are finished with 2 weeks of the new school year already.
I also noticed, I never blogged about Easter this year. I found pics of my Gramma & Dee that I never posted...what the heck!?!?
Well, I am sick today & plan on being home all day tomorrow and possibly Monday, so let's see how much I can update.
I may be back dating some of these, so they correspond with the correct days. Anyhoot...TTYL

We're movin on up...

2010-07-22T19:31:00.001-07:00

We finally found Delayna a toddler bed! I am SO excited!!! Because, I am anticipating a good nights rest, after she transitions. She has slept with me (and I mean ME! smack up against me, under my armpit me, in my ribs me, legs kicked back on my legs me...UGH! Not easy for me to sleep at all!) since birth. She was so colicy & being a breastfed baby I just found it easier to have her sleep with me. Well, I'm done & went on a hunt!

Graduation Day!

2010-07-13T20:14:00.000-07:00

OK, so I'm about a month late posting this, but it's up!
Anthony graduated from Jr. High aka Middle School on June 10, 2010.
Jose, Delayna, Adriana, James, Gail, my mom & I all went to his graduation.
It was definitely a bitter sweet day! We are so very proud of our boy, but man, time sure has flown! I can't believe how much he has grown and how the years have placed us to where we are at today.
Here are some pics that I got...

Walking up

Waiting in line to hit the stage

Looking to see how much longer he has to wait...my boy, he was so nervous, but wouldn't admit it.

Standing with his Principle Mr. Wood

With a soccer buddy, Matthew Hamilton aka Matt aka Dynamite

Best Friends Forever! Jessica, Cera, Me & Ant

Ant & Cera (don't they look so happy together, I should bust out their bath pics! Ant is 20 days older than Cera...CRAZY!)

Silliness

Adi & Ant...she loves her big brother!

My Man & His Boy

Ant and his baby, Dizzy Dee...he loves his baby!

The boys swinging Dee

Taking "Bobo" out for breakfast

Awe, a Mama & Her Baby Boy...I love this kid!

Twilight Trilogy!!!

2010-07-13T14:42:00.000-07:00

Our local theater had a showing of Twilight, New Moon and the premier of Eclipse. I got tickets for Little & I to go to our first "Girls Night Out". We met up with Cynthia and Loretta at the theater...It was SUCH an awesome time and a night I will always remember!!!

Here's a pic of Little & I

Cynthia & Little

Cynthia & Adi's feet...we were waiting in line forever just to get in! Nothing else to take pics of I guess...LOL!

Beach Trip 7.12.10

2010-07-13T14:00:00.001-07:00

After being busy as ever these past few months, Jose had the day off and we decided to get the flock out of here! We took off and went to the beach. We found a perfect parking spot, not too far from the shore. It was empty where we went & enjoyed the day away from home, life, etc... (I even left my cell in the truck, so I wouldn't be tempted to text or facebook!) I really enjoyed myself and came home just in a different mood. Anyhoot, here's some pics (of course!)

My Honey Skin Boarding

Berry & I

My Pretty Girl

Delayna chasing the seagull

Honey, my other son & Ant

Bits made this sand creation. He was so excited, he asked me to take a picture. Then Little suggested putting it on Sprout. Which Bit's finished...Online dot com...LOL!

My sexy boy, getting so big & muscular

Papa & the babies

Friends & Heartache

2010-06-05T09:20:00.000-07:00

After reading my friend Jessica's blog, I decided to blog about my friends.
Once again, I'm at a crossroads as to who my "real friends" are. You think you have them and there are those who lead you to believe that they are your friend...BUT are they?
I had a deep intimate conversation with a friend recently who informed me that some of my "friends" have really been talking about me. Not only to her, but others. As well as others talking about me.
I'm not going to lie, it hurts. But I guess that's why I have this wall built up around my heart. Pastor Todd has taught us that if we have illness with our "brother or sister" we are to go to them. But how do you go to someone who is intentionally doing this...it's their character. I've heard it come out of their mouths about other people. Never thought that it would come out about me, but I guess if that's their character, they will talk about everyone.
I've ALWAYS had issues with making friends. I'm one who will love and trust you with all I have, and even if you hurt me, I will push it aside and continue to love you. Guess that's what happens when your abused as a child. But as I've grown older, I've learned to build a wall up. It's a defense mechanism. It allows me to let people "in", but if I'm ever hurt, the wall is there not allowing the pain to penetrate me. After an offense is done, I learn, I can't trust that person. I don't even know how to deal with it.
There was an incident that happened recently where someone meant to tell someone something about me, but ended up telling me. Not the other person. How do I deal with this? I acted as if nothing ever happened. It hurt, but I don't even know what to do. I now know this person isn't a friend. I now know I can't trust this person. I now know this person is another one of those people talking smack about me. I will NEVER be a "friend" to this person.
But how do I address this person? I feel as though it needs to be confronted, but how?
Melissa knows to just let it go & not say anything. To keep my wall up, but still be there to hang out or whatever.
I guess once again, it's been proven...You can't trust anyone! I've been hurt in my life enough, it's no wonder why I have such a hard wall built up around my heart and don't let anyone in to love me.
I've never really allowed anyone to break through and love me with the love that I deserve. Not God, my mom, Jose, no one. It really sucks, because I honestly don't know what it is to be truly loved. I've tried opening up, tearing my walls down, allowing God in. But sure enough, as soon as I open myself up, I am stabbed right in the heart by someone, causing me to close back up.
No wonder I have such a hard time with acceptance.
I don't know how/what to do to fix this. Guess it will take God & time.

My Friend, Jen

2010-05-26T15:53:00.000-07:00

I have a friend from Rodchester, NY that I met a little over 5 years ago on SheKnows (a board where a bunch of women chat about life issues. All of our babies were born in Dec '04).
Jen has been through some major obstacles, to say the least, in her life. She has ALWAYS been such an inspiration to me. Recently she started a journey of weight loss, which at this point, has gotten her 115 lighter than she was. She was featured in Democrat And Chronicle dot com...
Here is the Link: Jen Moore
I hope it inspires you as much as she has me!

Facebooking

2010-05-26T15:51:00.000-07:00

So, I've realized how much I put on Facebook and I'm not posting it here. I am going to try really hard to pull everything over.
I can't seem to figure out how to post from my cell phone to my blogger account...If anyone can help me out on that, please let me know.
Thus the reason why I just put it on Facebook. But my blog is really missing out.
So, that's all...Drive-Thru...Good-Bye =)

Sports Orientation...My little boy is growing up =(

2010-05-22T07:40:00.000-07:00

Didn't know how else to title this, but with what I'm gonna talk about.
Wednesday night Anthony & I went to the High School Sports Orientation. While it was pretty lame (due to the speaker they invited) it was kind of a sad/proud moment.
I sat with Kathleen's Mom (Ant's main squeeze's mom) and Linda Keck (Ant & her son Zach went to elementary school together). During the meeting I couldn't help but wander in thought about My Boy starting his new journey in life.
They showed pictures of kids who have achieved great things in their sports. One boy from Beaumont High now plays for the San Fransisco 49ers, another girl was presented an award...here is a blurb from the BHS sports website:
CHAMPION!!!

Junior Amanda Hendey has won the first state championship in Beaumont High School history. Amanda won the 126-lb. weight class at the girls' state wrestling championships at Hanford HS on Saturday by pinning her opponent in the 2nd period. Congratulations, Amanda! BHS is proud of you!

They spoke so much on the fact that they are very supportive of their athletes and want the best for them. How awesome to hear that? Especially from school staff!
After the speaker we were able to go meet the coaches. First was the football coach. I spoke to him regarding the rumors of the coaches not "allowing" the boys to play HS football and AYSO. He said that he would support Anthony, if that's what he wants to do, but wants Anthony at the practices and games. Which is understandable and already discussed to us with Lenny. Lenny (Ant's tournament soccer coach) is willing to allow Ant to practice with the football team during the week to get his conditioning and play him in the games on Saturday. Which is AWESOME! This is an awesome opportunity for Anthony to play both sports! OH, and the coaches to support him!
Next we went & spoke with the soccer coach (who just so happens to be the husband to Ant's old PE coach that kicked him out of her class. I think she had a crush on him & that's why she removed him, but whatever). He said that he wants Ant to only play soccer, not football. But that if he is skilled enough that he would work with him to play both sports. He is only taking 5 freshmen, so he will be holding try outs. He is going to have the boys go 1v1 to see their skills. Looking at the list, Ant will do really good up against the boys. We saw 2 boys that he would have good competition with.
After walking away, we were talking about GPA's and scholarships. Ant is stuck on "only needing to carry a 2.0 gpa". But if he wants a scholarship, he needs to focus on a 3.0 or higher. Which he is VERY capable of!
So, we are both really excited! I would LOVE to see my boy get a scholarship to college. He wants to go to USC, but God knows where he will be placed.
Looks like we are going to have our work cut out for us, but it will ALL be worth it in the end!
3 weeks of school left & my boy will be graduating from Jr. High!
Beaumont High School, Here We Come!

Look, she's praying

2010-05-11T17:02:00.000-07:00

Last night we all sat down to eat and Delayna kept putting her head down on her hand on the table. We were trying to figure out what she was doing. We noticed she wasn't eating and kept doing this.
So, I announced, "Let's say our prayers so we can eat."
Jose said he would say them and again, she put her head down on her hands and kept her head down. He started praying and as he did, I watched her. She would pop her head up, look around and see we were still praying and then put her head back down.
My little girl is SO sweet. It blesses my heart to see that she is praying with us over dinner.

Wall*E Does It!

2010-05-11T16:50:00.000-07:00

Dominic has got to be THEE cutest little boy I know! Seriously & not just because he is mine.
Today, Allan & Shelli came over to get a tile saw from my Honey. Dominic put on the movie Wall*E and Allan & I were talking about it. Allan had never seen it, so I was explaining the movie and the story line to him.
Later we go outside to get him the tile saw and Dominic finds a fire extinguisher we have in the garage. He is messing with it while I was helping Allan pull all the stuff surrounding the saw out. We both carry it to his truck, I turn around and I see Dominic holding this fire extinguisher in his hand trying to 'spray' it.
I asked him, "Mijo, what are you doing?"
He tells me, "I'm trying to spray it Mama."
Me~"Why do you want to spray it, it's dangerous and could make you sick or get in your eyes."
Dom~"Well Mama, Wall*E does it and he flies."
Me, trying to contain my exposure and not bust up laughing, "Dominic, Wall*E is a robot, he's in outer space and it's just a movie. You can't spray that and go flying."
Dom~"But Mama, Wall*E flies, I want to fly all around like him too."

After about 10 mins of repetitive explanation, he finally gave up the fight and said...
"Fine, you take it, you spray it, and you go flying by yourself!"
He's such a character!

My clothes aren't green & pokey

2010-04-16T11:28:00.000-07:00

Yesterday I was taking the kiddos to school. After dropping the two big ones off, Dom asked me, "Mama, wanna play eye spy?"
Me: "Sure, you go first"
So we were playing along and it was my turn. I said, "I spy with my little eye something green and pokey." (referring to some palm trees)
Dom~"Those twees ovah dewr?" (referring to the pine trees)
Me~"No, but your close."
Dom~ Lifting up his sweat shirt looking at his tee shirt, "Mama, my clothes awen't gween & pokey."
He miss understood me saying "he was close" to "his clothes"!
LOLOLOL!!!

Joseph 1:9

2010-03-21T21:16:00.000-07:00

I know, there isn't a scripture, or even a book of Joseph. But just read on...
Today while driving home from church, Dominic was talking to me about his class. He was kinda sad and said that there were only 3 kids in his class today. So I perked it up and started discussing what he learned in class today.
He began reading his paper...Be strong and have courage. The Lord is with you. Joseph 1:9
Isn't he the cutest!?!?! I am SO proud of how much his is learning and able to recite.
Well, back to Joseph. We told him that it is actually Joshua 1:9, not Joseph. He insisted and argued that "Ms. Bwidget" said that it is Joseph. So, we left it at that. Hey, what can I say, at least he can read and recite his bible verse, right!?!
He LOVES going to church, really he does! Today we had tournament for Ant in Rancho Cucamonga. We planned on having Jose go to church and I would take the kids out with me & he would meet up with us, if Ant went on. Dominic threw the biggest fit that he didn't want to go to soccer, he wanted to go to chuch with Gwammie. Of course God knew what he was doing and arrange our day accordingly. But it's too cute to see my little boy so in love with going to church every Sunday and seeing Ms. Bwidget and Ms. Kaffy.

The LORD is close to the brokenhearted

2010-03-05T15:00:00.000-08:00

The LORD is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit. Psalm 34:18

Jose's brother, Mario has been fighting a 6 year battle of cancer. Jose's family called him on Wednesday morning to inform him that he is in the hospital with days left to live. My poor husband is simply devastated. I asked him to share his feelings with me last night and all he could say is, "I can't imagine never being able to see my brother again."
Even though we are over 2,200 miles apart, Mario was the only one out of the family that cared or desired a relationship to continue to grow with Jose. He is also the only one that ever liked me, or cared to have a relationship with me. Mario was truly a sweetheart, caring, loving and just a great person all around.
Jose is frantically trying to get his passport updated and plane tickets to get over there before Mario passes.
I am just praying that the Lord gives Jose peace, strength & an outpouring of love at this time.

Will you ride on your chariot?

2010-02-04T06:03:00.000-08:00

Hmmm, where do I begin? I will start with last Tuesday when it all began...
We recieved a call from Johana (the lady working on our loan modification) she told me that Jose needs to call Tony over at GMAC to discuss our case.
That night Johana came over and met with us and we were able to call Tony up. Tony basically told us that our house was going into a trustee sale on Friday and we needed to come up with $6,000 to hold our house and get it out of the trustee sale auction. Obviously that wasn't something we could just pull out of our hats. Jose argued with Tony asking him why he can't just do the loan modification. Tony argued (he just was NOT a nice guy at all) that we failed the first loan modification that was set for us back in June of last year. Well, Mr. Tony is 100% wrong! WE did not fail the contract, they re-nigged on us! We signed notarized documents stating that our payment was going to be $1,230 a month. After we paid two months worth, they sent us a supplemental bill for $600. When we called and asked what the bill was and to find out why nothing was put towards our payments, they stated that THEY forgot to include our impound account and that our payments would actually be $1,830...WHAT!?!?! Our original was $2,200!
After arguing our points they explained they would send out another loan modification packet and see what they could do. So we submit everything, yada yada yada...
Tony doesn't want to admit that HIS company was wrong, not us! So Jose asked him if he could call him Wednesday morning to see what we could put out to keep our home from going into the trustee sale. Tony agreed and was totally fine with it. Johana was beside herself. I explained to her that God has it ALL in his hands and that His will, will be done. She couldn't believe how I stood in my faith. I looked her in her eyes and told her how I KNOW my God is a good God! He has brought Jose back from TJ when they wanted to deport him. How I talked to an Angel on the phone who gave me precise directions of what to do and how that saved him. I've seen God work in my life so many times, I can't now fall apart and not trust in him. As Johana stood in my door way with tears streaming down her face and listening to me tell her how I serve a God who will keep my family wrapped in his arms, she was just in a state of awe and fear. I told her, "Don't be scared for my family, God knows what he's doing". She commented to me, "Melissa, you say that you need motivation from me to get your business rolling, your faith is what is keeping my head up while walking out of your house with no answers." All I can say is, God knows what he's doing & nothing I do can change it...It can stop it & hinder it, but not change.
That night we gathered our children together to explain to them that God has us on a journey, we don't know what we are doing or where we are going, but he does. I asked them to open their hearts with Jose and I and to pray that HIS will will be done in this situation. That we would be sensitive to his voice and open a door to what he has for us.
~Wednesday comes and Jose calls, no answer, so he leaves a message. He calls again, no answer, leaves another message.
~Thursday comes, Jose calls again, still no answer & leaves yet another message. We are getting worried, so I call Johana up and let her know that we aren't getting an answer. She got on the phone and called GMAC. She spoke to a very polite woman who explained that Tony is out of the office for the remainder of the week. He left notes on our case that the company is to go forward with the trustee sale! WHAT THE HECK!?!?! Johana asks if there is anyone else we can talk to regarding the situation and the lady explained that if it's Tony's case, he's the only one allowed to handle it.
I talk to Johana, get her "worse case scenario". She told me that the trustee sales haven't been going through because the houses are still depreciated so much in Riverside County that when they go to sell them, they are asking more than what it's worth. She said we would be notified in 7-9 days whether the house was sold or not and we would have about 45 days to move.
~Friday morning~A very familiar face comes knocking at my door while I am home tending to my sick girls. Oh yes, on top of my house crashing I have Delayna who is sick vomiting and with diarrhea and Adriana who slammed a 5 lb weight on her pinky finger. My home is upside down!
Ms. Familiar face explains to me that my house is in a trustee sale auction and that her investor is down there waiting to place a bid on our house. If he takes it he will offer me "xxx" amount of dollars. I tell her I am sorry, but there is nothing I can do, I'm not the owner. She goes on to give me her spill, but I don't want to hear it. I call Johana up to tell her what happen and as I'm on the phone with her, I go outside to through a very dirty diaper and soiled clothes into a trash can and there is a HUGE truck sitting in my driveway looking at my house! I went off screaming & yelling. Johana told me to tell anyone that wants to offer me anything to give me $5,000 and 30 days to move. Well....no one ever came back until around 11:30am. I was up cleaning Delayna, from yet another accident. Someone knocked & I went to look out my window. It was a heating & electric guy, so I ignored it. Mom went out about 5 mins later and I hear Adi come running upstairs screaming, "Mom, look what's on our door!" It was a letter stating "3 DAYS TO QUIT".
Now my grandpa being a property owner & my mom managing, that sign was VERY familiar to me! We have WHAT!?! I was freaking out! I called up Jose to tell him & he just had no answers. Mom called Grandma to find out if they can do this and Grandpa told me to call the person on the paper. I called, but no answer, so I left a message. Monica was on her way over, so when she got here she had me call up the number on there again, this time I got an answer. "Fabby" explained to me that the 3 days is a scare tactic. She continued on to give me my options of what I can do next...
1~Take $1,200 and 3 weeks to move out with no damage to the home
2~Start an eviction process, which would give us 30-45 days
Now, from my property management past, I KNEW I didn't want to go into property management proceedings!
She told me she would give us the weekend to think it over and to call her on Monday with our choice.
I hung up and I was just flabbergasted! Not so much that we lost our home, because I know God is working, but more that we ONLY have 3 weeks!
I immediately felt anxiety strike! I kept talking to God, I wanted him to carry me through, but my flesh was SO week. The anxiety took me over. I began looking online for houses for rent. I had to think about packing, getting my family ready and a place for us to go. My stomach felt like a knife had been placed in it and twisted until all my guts were wrapped up in it and it was getting ready to be pulled out of me. I've commented that I felt like a drug addict, looking for my fix...I desperately needed to find my family a house. And one that we could ALL fit in to. Not only that, but I needed to stay in a budget. We can't do these $1,700 rentals.
I knew God needed to work on my behalf, because my flesh was failing me and fast! I continued to stand on his word & promises. Mishelle posted something on her facebook that really ministered to me and I claimed it for my family:

As Jehoshaphat stood and faced the battle of his life...his words to Our God was...."We know not what to do, but our eyes are fixed upon You." You may be facing the battle of your life today...fix your eyes upon Him and let Him fight the battle for You! 2 Chr 20:12

~Saturday came and Jose & Ant had their soccer tournament games. So in between watching games, I was running around opening doors (literally) searching for what God had for my family. We looked at a really nice house, 4 bedroom 2 1/2 bath for $1,700. It was brand new, right around the corner from two of our pastors from church, great location. We hurried to put in our app & check for our credit check. Monica found one right next door and submitted her app. After a LONG draining day, we headed over to Eric & Jen Box's house for dinner with them and the Evangelistas. Boy, does God know where to place you in your time of need. If you are open to what he wants to put in you, he will fill you to the brim and give you overflow! We not only were fed physically that night, but we were fed spiritually and lifted up all day. Even at the soccer game, we had people from church come to the field and giveus words of encouragement.
Later in the afternoon Darci called me and told me that there was a house up for rent over by her. She gave me the number and I called, with no answer. So I left a message.
That night, we went home and went to bed. I felt an ease in my anxiety. Woke up in the middle of the night to a VERY sick vomiting baby. We tried to rest, but it was hard.
~Sunday, I woke up and had such a beautiful sweet peace. My grandma sent me something via email and I was emailing her back and forth. God talked to me and this is what was said through the emails:

“I am with you always, even to the end of the age.” Matthew 28:20 NKJV

A storm on the Sea of Galilee was akin to a sumo wrestler’s belly flop in a kiddie pool. The northern valley acted like a wind tunnel, compressing and hosing squalls onto the lake. Waves as tall as ten feet were common . . .

[Yet] from the center of the storm, the unwavering Jesus shouts “I am.” Tall in the Trade Tower wreckage. Bold against the Galilean waves. ICU, battlefield, boardroom, prison cell or maternity ward—whatever you storm, “I am.”

I thanked Grama and had a word to tell her. Something God said directly to me in the midst of my storm:

I was anxiety stricken the first day, but after prayer & just being still, he told me...

"Take your day and mourn, cry, scream & let it out. But you and Jose go to bed tonight, I will give you peace that surpasses all understanding. You will wake up, dust yourself off and walk in my path. Exhaust all of your options and see I will open the door to your next journey."

It is SO hard to just not know. But I have had SO many people come up beside me and offer help, support, love, etc. God knows what we need and we will continue to be still and rest in His promises while we wait for a door to open.

Thank you for agreeing with us in prayer. I know God has a journey to take us on. I don't know what, but my spirit is kind of excited. He has GREAT things for my family and I praise Him while walking through the valley!

I was excited! My spirit was jumping for joy for some reason. He also told me, "You are not getting that house you applied for. I have something better for you."
My mom has been telling us that we need to find a house in the price range of $1,400-$1,500. Not 15-16. I kept telling her she's crazy, there's nothing out there!
We got ready for church and as we were getting ready, I called the number for the house over by Darci. The man only spoke spanish, so I tried in my reatarded spanish language to ask him about the house. After a few sentences, I figured it would be better if Jose talked to him. He got off the phone and told me that he has this 6 bedroom, 4 bath house up for rent for (WATCH THIS!...) $1,490! I was freaking out! We had to pounce this! The man told Jose that he was going to place it in the paper and have an open house on Wednesday. On Wednesday we can go down and do an application. it will be first come first serve type basis. There was NO way! I told Jose, he had to call him back and tell him we want this house NOW!
Well, Delayna threw up again. I wasn't going to allow this to continue, so I told Jose I was going to take her to Urgent Care. We got ready and had my mom take the kids to church. While in urgent care, God brought Kim Diaz & Noe to us again. Just a peace knowing these people are here by our side. While there Jose and I were able to talk about the house. He said when he got home that he would call the guy. After 3 hours in Urgent Care, to see the stupidest Dr ever, we went home with "just a stomach virus". We got a few more phone calls before we arrived at home, just as encouragement and to find out how Dee was doing. Come to find out PT got word about her and had the congregation pray for her. God knows doesn't he!?! In my opinion, with prayers being lifted up for my family, it wasn't just for Dee's little bdy, but our whole situation!
We got home and invited James & Gail over for lunch. After we ate, Jose went up to call the guy. I went up to check on Dee who woke up while he was on the phone. I stood there as he talked. He hung up and explained to me that the man wanted him to call him back Monday morning to discuss details and do credit checks.
~Monday...I was on pins & needles watching the clock for a phone call from Jose. I called to get Delayna in to her Dr, because once again, she threw up! So that kept me a bit occupied. Jose called me just before 11:30 to tell me that I have to fax "xyz" over to some person. the day went on and Jose called me again to tell me to go to the store, get a money order and be ready to meet him in Riverside so we can drive out to Downy to get the keys to our new home!
We went down and did all the paper work, mind you, we haven't even seen this house yet.
We just opened a door that we felt God lead us to (two doors were already slammed in our faces) but as we continued to knock, He opened this door to us!
We got back into town at 9:30pm. I called up Darci to ask her about electricity, she found us a flashlight.
She met us in our driveway, with the flashlight =)
I opened the door to the house and I began to see God's hand. Wood floors, a room for mom, with her OWN bathroom, dining area, HUGE kitchen, GREAT room with built in shelfing stuff...oh wait, what's this? Another room? NO, it's a THEATER! With real seats and cupholders, decor to match! Another full bath, laundry room the size of a kid's bedroom, with cupboards, awesome closet under the stairs...Oh, stairs and a HUGE mirror, turn the corner and go up the second flite, what is this? A LOFT!?!?! Like for my babies to have their own 'play area'!?!?!? The master suite, with gorgeous decor, the bathroom, HUGE! WHAT? This isn't just a walk in closet, this is another bedroom, this closet is MASSIVE! Down the hall, another bathroom with double sinks and a seperate shower, now my kids can all get ready in the morning! Linen closet that is huge, oh, and what's this behind the closet? WHAT? NO! GET OUT OF HERE!!!!! IT IS AN OFFICE WITH DOUBLE DESKS! Now tears are streaming down my face (you see, God told me my business was going to take off so much I had to get my own office, but in my house, there was no room. He's had a plan ALL along!). Room number 3, adorable for the girls! Room #4, oh this is nice, must be Ants, it sure is, because room #5 is PERFECT for Dom...I know what's being done in here.
I can't tell you how flabbergasted I am right now! I have A LOT of work ahead of me in these next 2 1/2 weeks. But God's had a plan ALL along!
Charlie taught at church last night and as I sat in awe of him (as I ALWAYS do, I think I can listen to him speak all day & not get tired of it) God gave Jose and I a revelation. See, all the testimonies that came out of church on Sunday, I was angry at God for "allowing" us to miss the outpouring of his spirit. But He had another plan, he didn't want us to recieve our fill in that manner, he gave it to us a different way. And last night, he revealed his hand upon us this whole time.
Charlie talked about the trials in our lives as chariots. He asked, will you jump on and ride with God or will you wrestle with him?
Jose and I chose to jump on, right away, fully! God took us down our paths, no it wasn't easy, and boy did it hurt. But, we went on our ride. Charlie also spoke on, "You never know." Quite a few times the subject of Jose and I buying this home came up, and last night we walked away with...You never know.
I posted this so that anyone reading this can see, I do serve a MIGHTY God! He is alive in me and active in my life. If you allow him, he can be just as active in your life. It's not to say we don't go through things, but if we choose to jump on the chariot and ride it out with him as the horse. Then we know where we are going is Good!
It is in the valleys that we grow. Hiding under the eagles wings, I will soar with Him, ALL of my days!
PRAISE GOD, It's all I have in me!

364 Days

2010-01-19T20:53:00.000-08:00

Today my little girl is 364 days old...yes, tomorrow is her first birthday.
I can't believe that it has been a whole year since this little girl has been brought into our lives. She is SUCH a joy to have! There are so many things that we have been through this last year, too many to list right now, because she is screaming and want to go to bed.
I will try to do a 1 year post tomorrow. In the mean time, I will leave you with a pic of her in her dedication dress...

Delayna's Dedication

2010-01-12T10:31:00.001-08:00

Well, in 2 Sundays, Jose and I have scheduled to dedicate Delayna. This is something that I honestly have struggled with for a year. To me, a dedication is taken seriously.
Merriam-Webster defines dedication as: 1. an act or rite of dedicating to a divine being 2. self-sacrificing devotion (amongst 2 other definitions).
In my heart, when I dedicated my other 3 children, I was standing in front of not only my church family, but ultimately God. I took a vow that I would trust Him with my precious children's lives. That NO MATTER what would happen, come our way, Jose and I would trust that He would take care of my children at all times. Now you tell me that you can put your children's lives in someones hands and just be ok with it.
So this time with Delayna, knowing she's my last baby, my precious jewel, I've battled with her dedication. Not that I don't trust God, in all his ways. Or that I don't want to believe that all will be ok, etc. I do trust him, I love him, and I know he will carry my children all the days of their lives...but it's just been hard.
So, Jose and I were talking and we decided it was time. We are doing it on the 24th, because, well, she'll be a year on the 20th and it's the following Sunday ;-)
I also struggled this time with having Godparents for her. I asked very special people that were in my lives with Anthony & Adriana to be their Godparents. Unfortunately through those experiences it damaged my thoughts of Godparents and ever being able to have someone in my children's lives that I could KNOW beyond a shadow of a doubt that no matter what ever happened to Jose and I, that they would be there to raise them up under His laws, ways and love.
Well, through MUCH prayer, seeking & careful consideration. Jose and I agreed that we would give Delayna Godparents. I feel as though my children should have someone in their lives that they know they could ALWAYS, no matter what, turn to them and find Godly counsel (yes, there is a difference!). And family sometimes is just too close!
So, we approached Noe & Monica with the offer of being Delayna's Godparents. I can happily say, they accepted the responsibility. Monica even stated, that she would like to take all 4 under and be their Godparents too. So, we will see what God has in store for that.
I have also asked some very special people in my life, that through our lives have been by my side through thick and thin. I have been able to turn to them, cry on their shoulders, find comfort & refuge when I needed someone other than my family.
So I asked Allan & Angel, Jessica and Mona (awe,well Mona is another story) to stand with my family. Promising to be there for my baby girl, just as they have me. They all agreed to take the responsibility also.
Wow, what a day it is going to be!

Here is her GORGEOUS dress, she will be getting a little jacket type thing to wear with it. Her Granina & Tianina(that would be Monica's mom & sister...get it her Grandma+Nina=Granina, Tia+Nina=Tianina...LOL, I bust myself up sometimes!) is going crazy having finding her stuff!

And her little shoes

She is gonna be the queen of the ball!

You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart

2010-01-11T06:19:00.001-08:00

This is what I captured at 5:30am from my back yard...Pure & simple beauty!
God has been telling me for awhile to take the time to spend with him daily. Since I'm not much of a "New Years Resolution" girl, but more of one to set goals that I can attain, this was one goal I made for myself this year.
6am has been the "special hour" that I am to get up and seek him daily. Well this morning He had me up at 3 am. Since having Delayna, my sleep has not been good AT ALL! Well, recently she has finally been sleeping for blocks of hours. Jose and I went to sleep at 10pm last night & Delayna slept until 3 am. I patted her back to sleep, but my body was awake. So as I laid in bed, I just prayed over some situations that have been going on in my family. After a while, I fell back to sleep, but was awoken by my dear husband at 3:45, then Delayna at 4 am. After nursing her back to sleep, I decided to get up and take advantage of my body being awake. I got my coffee & toast and sat in my chair, bible, highlighter, pin & bible study in my lap as I began to pray.
Then I opened my bible study book up to begin the work after my chapters. My book is:
A Woman's Secret to a Balanced Life, focusing on the Proverbs 31 Woman. As I did the study guide, it took me to Proverbs 31:10-31. I read the passage & I was remembered of the first time I read it. I lived in my house on Orange Street. I was in my back yard with my mom and I had just discovered the passage. I can remember the feelings, thoughts, emotions I felt as it was revealed to me and I remember how deeply I wanted to be like that Proverbs 31 woman. Time went by and as I was brought back to it today my eyes were open to some things.
My book titles it "A Wife of Noble Character". It has you read the passage it asks you to list the qualities that made this wife excellent. So as I read, I listed...Comforter, Encourager, Provider, Nurturer, Loves, Hard Worker, Counselor, Strong, Dignified.
Then it asks, "What kind of choices has she made that make her worthy of praise?"
In my book, it has a footnote on vs. 29 & 30, where we find the answer to this question. Verses 29 & 30 states, "Many daughters have done virtuously, nobly, and well, but you excel them all. Charm and grace are deceptive, and beauty is vain, but a woman who reverently and worshipfully fears the Lord, she shall be praised!"
My footnote states, "In what way did she "excel them all"? In her spiritual and practical devotion to God, which permeated every area and relationship of her life. Her secret, which is open to everyone, is the Holy Spirit's climax to the story, and to this book. In Prov. 31:30, it becomes clear that the "reverent and worshipful fear of the Lord", which is "the beginning of Wisdom" (Prov. 9:10), is put forth as the true foundation for a life which is valued by God and her husband as "far above rubies or pearls" (Prov. 31:10)
So am I a wife of noble character? No, I'm by no means meeting all of these expectations, but I see how my heart has been changed to live the exampled life. How I am striving to meet these goals.
Jeremiah 29:13 states: "You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart"
So, as I begin my early mornings, my plan is to seek him with all my heart. This may not always be easy, but thru Him and in Him I find my strength. Knowing as the verse says, "seek with ALL your heart" I will find him.
Becoming that wife of noble character, the woman who can comfort, encourage, rise while it is yet night, preparing food & organizing her day, is a financial steward, has endurance for her daily tasks, quick to assist anyone in need, girding myself with strength (spiritually, mentally, and physically), opening my mouth with skillful and godly wisdom. Then my children will respect and bless me, as my husband will join in with boasts and praise.
I pray you have a blessed day and that the Lord reveals his grace and love in your life.

Keeping me on my toes!

2010-01-07T17:49:00.001-08:00

Enough said...

We have made progress!!!

2010-01-06T17:36:00.000-08:00

So, MOTS started back up today from an almost 2 month break. I was a little scared to take Delayna in, because before she just wouldn't stay.
Well, when I got there, Kindra was dropping of Gideon & he wasn't having a good morning either. Which made my emotions a bit better (you know when someone else is in your same shoes at the same time, it kinda helps). So I told the ladies about her little puppy & everything else that they may need to know about. Handed her over & walked out. I heard her fussing, so I let Talicia know that she has snacks & other stuff in her bag, that may help distract her. And off I went...
When the session was over I realized I went through the whole meeting without Talicia coming for me to get her.
Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa, she made it through the whole meeting without me. The ladies said that she fussed for a bit, but that was it. I am SO happy she's finally coming around!
Just thought I would update...
(OH, I have been going crazy this past week! Busy as all get out...which is great, but man am I exhausted!!!)
K, that's all for now...TTYL!

So Long 2009...Hello 2010

2009-12-31T23:20:00.000-08:00

What a year this has been, let me tell ya! I think everyone is in the same boat as to financial bumps, but there have also been so much more that my family, friends & loved ones have been affected by!

I started last year, 9 months pregnant, stressed and just believing God for great things as we were about to have our fourth baby.
God showed himself in a miraculous way, very personally. I saw things working together as he continued to teach me to trust in Him & Him alone. I had something deep down inside telling me that my baby was going to be a girl (because if it were a boy, things would have been MUCH more difficult!). Well, I feel as though God was showing me that it in fact was a girl, it was a promise to me about our blessing & for me to learn that "ALL things work to good for those who love the lord."
January 20, 2009 we gave birth to our blessing, promise, baby girl, Delayna Lynn Herrera.

My Honey has truly grown tremendously in God. He always loved the Lord and attended church with me, but MAN this past year he has really become a Man of God!

Anthony & Adriana had AWESOME soccer success. They both made tournaments & Spring Select. We traveled with Ant's team all over, watching them play AWESOME games!!!
Adriana set a goal for most goals made in a U10 girls division...My girl KICKS BUTT!!

Anthony went to Hooters for the first time with his soccer tournament team.

I have lost a total of 30lbs since getting pregnant with Delayna.

I clothed diapered, then gave up.

I learned the true meaning of the need to take care of myself. As a mom, wife, Youth Leader, Soccer Fundraiser Coordinator, friend, and the list goes on I forget to remember I am a human & need nurturing also.

I was blessed with the position of a table leader at MOTS.

We got a Wii! Yes, that's a big deal!

Dominic came down with a CRAZY illness, that we still don't know what was wrong with him. He was running crazy fevers, lethargic, blood in his urine, just crazy! Through prayers & trusting in the Lord, he was healed.

I went to my first LIFT conference. Wow, incredible!

My baby girl promoted from the 5th grade & started 6th grade

My baby boy started kindergarten...Now that was hard! He is such a MAMA's boy!!! It was a transition!

My BFF's Allan & Angel made the decision to commit their lives to God & were "re-born" in my church and have been serving besides us since!

My dear friend Arlene was diagnosed with cancer. We are believing for a total healing in her body!

I turned 31! I must say, they are SO much better than 20's!

Jose & I were called to be leaders in our church. Where we will be leading is still to be determined, but God has a plan that we are working on. NOT easy, believe you me, I have been going through some growing pains.

Patrick Swayze died...Yes, it was sad!

I taught my first small group at FUSION.

My dear cousin Robin went home to be with the Lord. As much as it was a great homecoming for her, she is dearly missed! I wear her necklace her mom sent me everyday. Seriously, it hasn't came off but one day to wear another that matched what I was wearing better.

We learned that Delayna is allergic to Cefdinir. And not the easy way!

I learned that the Lord has SO much for my family than I could ever dream or imagine. That as long as I walk in his will, it will all come to flourish-in!

I hope you had a great New Years Eve & a blessed New Years! Welcome 2010

Christmas Blessings

2009-12-31T08:28:00.001-08:00

WOW, what a difference a year can make! This time last year, Jose & I were struggling, stressed, not knowing what we were going to do for anything. The Lord came through and blessed us tremendously! I praise Him & give him ALL the glory! This year, God spoke to Jose & I both, separately and we were able to bless a family in our church that wasn't able to provide Christmas for their family. And still have a great Christmas for ours...What an AWESOME God I serve!
This year, we were more focused on the "needs" of our children and what we bought to be more "useful" rather than just "another toy/game". Also, God spoke to my heart and told me to bless a special somebody in my life...my Honey! I saved up and was able to make a couple of Ben Franklin's since resigning with Pampered Chef. So I teamed up with my compadres and had Noe help me buy my Honey a GUITAR! Jose has had a yearning to learn the guitar and start playing. This is something I believe God placed in his heart, I don't know why, my husband can't keep a beat to save his life, but OK, if it's God's will & doing, I'm all in!
So Christmas morning, we all opened our gifts. After we were all done, Jose went to go get more coffee & we stopped him. I pointed to the note on the tree that just had a few things written to him & explained to him that he was going to go on a hunt. WAIT, let me back up...I wrapped up his new picks & guitar strap (he has a guitar my grandpa gave him, so I made it look as though I bought stuff for that guitar). Well, the hunt began, to each of the kids' rooms. Everyone wrote something positive to him on the note & sent him to the next destination, ending in my mom's room, behind her door, where he found his case (I told him he had to open the case to find his "strings"). Inside the case was more than "just strings", it was his guitar with a note that I slipped inside, pouring my heart out to him of what God has instructed me to do. Well, needless to say, there were LOTS of tears!
He got to enjoy his guitar for a while, the kids their stuff and we prepared to head off to my Grandpa & Grandma Roof's house to have dinner. Here's some pics from our day...

Jose & I

Ooooh La La

My Cute Grandpa

My GORGEOUS Cousin Lourdes & Bryan

My cute Grandma with her Pippy

Aunt Vonnie playing ball with the kids

Grandpa & Alli

Bryan & I

Mexican Train with Lourdes, Ant, Alli, Adrian, Adi & Jose

What it's all for!

Family tradition of getting the olives onto ALL 10 fingers!

Then to eat them off...

The Little Sisters

My babies & I

Little & my crazy socks

My pretty little girl

Look at Miss Santa Baby

The littles

Time for Wii

The journey for his gift begins...

Tears of joy

Isn't she purty!!!

Checking it out

The smile says it all

And those are just the pics Honey, you just wait ;-)

Opening her first Christmas present

Good Luck Keeping Up, I Can't Even Do It...

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Perfect portion

Day 5 of my 21 Day Daniel Fast

Kids say the darndest...Delayna

Woah Buddy!

Jesus Made...

That's yo seat

30 Days Of Thankfulness, Day 2

30 Days Of Thankfulness, Day 1

Halloween 2011

There's a snake in my boots!

Weight loss journey

My New Necklace

Having fun with lunch

Scary thought

More on Loving the Unlovable

Loving the Unlovable

And my gum

My Destination?

I beat my husband...

Last Titans Soccer Tournament

Mama, Moon Moon Moon!

Pool Party @ Amber's House

Back to the inhaler we go

Bible Study #4...Coffee Hour With Chicklit Power by Evinda Lepins

Bible Study Follow Up

Frustration

Just a little news article

Relay For Life 2011

Follow up to my 35 before 35

Sweetest Blessings

Golden Way

Hello loves

Icing on the cake...

Yay for LA!

Out of the nose of babes...

Pneumonia Girl

My boy...

Kee Kee Wosabeww

Mama's chichi's

2011 Winter Formal

Happy Birthday Bewwy

Hellooooo There!!!

She needs a clip

Mama, Papa me go wunning

True friendship...

Curious

30 days of Thankfulness ~Day 22

30 days of Thankfulness ~4 days behind

How do you do it?

Test drive

Broken

30 days of Thankfulness ~Day 18

30 days of Thankfulness ~Day 17

30 days of Thankfulness ~Day 16

30 days of Thankfulness ~Day 15

30 days of Thankfulness ~Day 14

30 days of Thankfulness ~Day 13

30 days of Thankfulness ~Day 12

30 days of Thankfulness ~Day 11

30 days of Thankfulness ~Day 10

30 days of Thankfulness ~Day 9

30 days of Thankfulness ~Day 8

30 days of Thankfulness ~Day 7

30 days of Thankfulness ~Day 6

30 days of Thankfulness ~Day 5

Interruption

30 days of Thankfulness ~Day 4

30 days of Thankfulness ~Day 3

30 days of Thankfulness ~Day 2

30 days of Thankfulness ~Day 1

Not so great news

Beaumont vs Yucaipa-Freshman Football

I'm birthing

Interception & a TD

UGH!

The thoughts that run through my head

Time

We're movin on up...

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